Ask Meats......He Knows!

Reflection as I Get Older!

2011-12-29T07:53:00.000-05:00

Getting ready to turn the big six zero....not too happy about it, but it beats the alternative!
It's been a great life, no complaints....just wish I had more than 20 or, if I'm lucky, 30 more years.
The past 30 just flew by, and the 30 before that....well I don't think I lived enough in the moment...... people just don't appreciate the life they have at the time.... they just wish to be 21, then married, then kids......my advice (for what it's worth) enjoy every moment of your life, no matter what
stage you are in.....young, adult, older adult (grandparents), or really older adult (great grandparents)...just enjoy your life while you have it!!

Happy New Year to all of my faithful followers! Meats

History Lesson For The Day!

2011-12-12T06:43:00.001-05:00

There is one Christmas Carol that has always baffled me.What in the world do leaping lords, French hens,swimming swans, and especially the partridge who won't come outof the pear tree have to do with Christmas? This week, I found out.From 1558 until 1829, Roman Catholics in England werenot permitted to practice their faith openly. Someoneduring that era wrote this carol as a catechism song for young Catholics.It has two levels of meaning: the surface meaningplus a hidden meaning known only to members of their church. Eachelement in the carol has a code word for a religious realitywhich the children could remember.-The partridge in a pear tree was Jesus Christ.-Two turtle doves were the Old and New Testaments.-Three French hens stood for faith, hope and love.-The four calling birds were the four gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke & John.-The five golden rings recalled the Torah or Law, the first five books of the Old Testament.-The six geese a-laying stood for the six days of creation.-Seven swans a-swimming represented the sevenfold gifts of the Holy Spirit--Prophesy, Serving, Teaching, Exhortation, Contribution, Leadership, and Mercy.-The eight maids a-milking were the eight beatitudes.-Nine ladies dancing were the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit--Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self Control.-The ten lords a-leaping were the ten commandments.-The eleven pipers piping stood for the eleven faithful disciples.-The twelve drummers drumming symbolized the twelve points of belief in the Apostles' Creed.So there is your history for today. This knowledge was shared with me and I found it interesting and enlightening and now I know how that strange song became a Christmas Carol...so pass it on if you wish.'Merry (Twelve Days of) Christmas Everyone

Where was Jesus born?

2011-12-11T15:58:00.001-05:00

A guy decides he will join a church – so he goes to the Catholic ChurchAnd asks the priest if he can join – the priest says sure – but asks him“where was Jesus born?” the guys says – “Pittsburgh” – the priest isoutraged and tells the guy to leave.So the guy goes down the street to the Methodist Church – and asks theMinister if he can join – he says sure - but asks him“where was Jesus born?” the guys says – “Pittsburgh” – the minister is alsooutraged and tells the guy to leave.So finally the guy goes to an All souls church and asks if he can join –they say sure and will teach him about Jesus – so the guy asks – “Wherewas Jesus born?” and the answer was “Bethlehem” – and the guy says“I knew it was somewhere in Pennsylvania”.

Common Sense Obituary

2011-12-10T16:34:00.001-05:00

An Obituary printed in the London Times.....Absolutely Brilliant: Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: - Knowing when to come in out of the rain; - Why the early bird gets the worm; - Life isn't always fair; - and maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot.She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter,Responsibility, and by his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights I Want It Now Someone Else Is To Blame I'm A Victim Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

Merry Christmas To All !!!

2011-12-10T08:20:00.001-05:00

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, 'Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?Surprised, but wanting to be honest with his kids, he answers, 'Well, son, there are three kinds of boobs:In her 20's, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30's to 40's, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions'. 'Onions?' 'Yes, you see them and they make you cry.' This infuriates his wife, but a moment later, the daughter asks, 'Mum, how many kinds of 'willies' are there? The mother smiles and, looking directly at her husband, answers, 'Well dear, a man goes through three phases in his life. In his 20's, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30's and 40's, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50's, it is like a Christmas Tree.' 'A Christmas tree?' 'Yes - the tree is dead and the balls are just for decoration!' Merry Christmas to all of my loyal followers!!! Meats

Spice it up....NOT!!!

2011-12-07T07:09:00.001-05:00

A frustrated wife buys a pair of crotchless panties in an attempt to spice up her dead sex-life. She puts them on, together with a short skirt and sits on the sofa opposite her husband. At strategic moments she uncrosses her legs ... enough times that her husband finally asks, "Are you wearing crotchless panties?" "Y-e-sss," she answers with a seductive smile. "Thank God - I thought you were sitting on the cat." He never heard the gunshot.

Quite a Women!!

2011-12-04T15:03:00.001-05:00

During WWII, Irena, got permission to work in the Warsaw ghetto, as aPlumbing/Sewer specialist. She had an 'ulterior motive'. She KNEW what the Nazi's plans were for the Jews (being German). Irena smuggled infants out in the bottom of the tool box she carriedand she carried in the back of her truck a burlap sack, (for largerkids). She also had a dog in the back that she trained to bark when the Nazisoldiers let her in and out of the ghetto.The soldiers of course wanted nothing to do with the dog and thebarking covered the kids/infants noises. During her time of doing this, she managed to smuggle out and save 2500kids/infants.She was caught, and the Nazi's broke both her legs, arms and beat herseverely. Irena kept a record of the names of all the kids she smuggled out andkept them in a glass jar, buried under a tree in her back yard.After the war, she tried to locate any parents that may have survivedit and reunited the family. Most had been gassed. Those kids she helped got placed into fosterfamily homes or adopted. Last year Irena was up for the Nobel Peace Prize. She was not selected. President Obama won one year before becoming President for his work asa community organizer for ACORNandAl Gore won also --- for a slide show on Global Warming. In MEMORIAM - 63 YEARS LATER I'm doing my small part by forwarding this message. I hope you'll consider doing the same..It is now more than 60 years after the Second World War in Europeended. This e-mail is being sent as a memorial chain, in memory of the sixmillion Jews, 20 million Russians, 10 million Christians and 1,900Catholic priests who were murdered, massacred, raped, burned, starvedand humiliated! Now, more than ever, with Iran , and others, claiming the HOLOCAUST tobe 'a myth'. It's imperative to make sure the world never forgets, because there areothers who would like to do it again.

The Outdoorsman!

2011-12-04T15:00:00.001-05:00

When my Doctor asked me If I led an active lifeI told him about my day:"Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded across the edgeof a deep lake, barely escaped from a wild pig inthe heavy brush, marched along a treacherous trail upand down a mountain, stood in a patch of poison ivy,crawled out of quicksand, and barely escaped jumpingaway from an aggressive brown snake."Inspired by my story, the Doctor said, "You must be anawesome outdoorsman!""No," I replied, "I'm just a shitty golfer."

A Life Lesson!

2011-12-02T16:54:00.001-05:00

A wise woman who was travelling in the mountains found a precious stone in a stream.The next day she met another traveler who was hungry, and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food. The hungry traveler saw the precious stone and asked the woman to give it to him. She did so without hesitation.The traveler left, rejoicing in his good fortune. He knew the stone was worth enough to give him security for a lifetime.But, a few days later, he came back to return the stone to the wise woman.“I’ve been thinking,” he said. “I know how valuable this stone is, but I give it back in the hope that you can give me something even more precious."Give me what you have within you that enabled you to give me this stone ."

Laugh For The Day!

2011-05-25T07:26:00.002-04:00

San Diego Woman Shot in Head

Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her in-laws and while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries. Later, her husband noticed her sitting in her car in the driveway with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with both hands behind the back of her head. He became concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda's eyes were now open and she looked very strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied that she had been shot in the back of the head and had been holding her brains in for over an hour.

The husband called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors were locked and Linda refused to remove her hands from her head.

When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a wad of bread dough on the back of her head. A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her head. When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially passed out, but quickly recovered. Linda is blonde, a Democrat and an Obama supporter, but that could all be a coincidence.

The defective biscuit canister was analyzed and it was determined to be Bush's fault.

Think You're Having a Bad Day?

2011-05-19T18:22:00.000-04:00

Feeling Unappreciated??

The next time you feel that nobody loves you,
no one cares, or that no one ever notices you:

Things Got Ya Down? Well Then, Consider These . . ..

In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 am, regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had something to do with the super natural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11:00 AM Sunday, so a worldwide team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents. The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 AM all of the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books, and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits. Just when the clock struck 11:00, Pookie Johnson , the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.

Still Having a Bad Day?

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez Oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.00. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were being released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.

Still think you are having a Bad Day?

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking his arm in two places. Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

Are Ya OK Now? - No?

Two animal rights defenders were protesting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn , Germany . Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly. The two helpless protesters were trampled to death.

What? STILL having a Bad Day?

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with 'Return to Sender' stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb; he opened it and was blown to bits. God is good!

There now, Feeling Better ?

The True Meaning Of Stress!

2011-05-18T07:12:00.001-04:00

A young lady confidently walked around the room while leading and explaining
stress management to an audience; with a raised glass of water, and everyone
knew she was going to ask the ultimate question, 'half empty or half
full?'..... She fooled them all... "How heavy is this glass of water?", she
inquired with a smile.

Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. To 20 oz.
She replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long I
hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for
an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll
have to call an ambulance. In each case it's the same weight, but the
longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes." She continued, "and that's the
way it is with stress. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or
later, as the burden becomes increasing ly heavy, we won't be able to carry
on."

"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest
before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the
burden - holding stress longer and better each time practiced. So, as early
in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don't carry them
through the evening and into the night... Pick them up tomorrow.
Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment. Relax,
pick them up later after you've rested. Life is short. Enjoy it and the now
'supposed' stress that you've conquered!"

1 * Accept the fact that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're
the statue!

2 * Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat
them.

3 * Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle
of it.

4 * Drive carefully... It's not only cars that can be recalled by their
Maker.

5 * If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

6 * If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably
worth it.

7 * It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning
to others.

8 * Never buy a car you can't push.

9 * Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you
won't have a leg to stand on.

10 * Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

11 * Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.

12 * The second mouse gets the cheese.

13 * When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

14 * Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.

15 * You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world
to one person.

16 * Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.

17 * We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty and
some are dull. Some have weird names and all are different colors, but they
all have to live in the same box.

18 * A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

19 * Have an awesome day and know that someone has thought about you today.

20 * It was me, your friend!
*Save the earth..... It's the only planet with chocolate!

Put Me In Charge!

2011-05-18T06:43:00.002-04:00

Put me in charge of food stamps. I'd get rid of Lone Star cards; no cash for Ding Dongs or Ho Ho's, just money for 50-pound bags of rice and beans, blocks of cheese and all the powdered milk you can haul away. If you want steak and frozen pizza, then get a job.

Put me in charge of Medicaid. The first thing I'd do is to get women Norplant birth control implants or tubal ligations. Then, we'll test recipients for drugs, alcohol, and nicotine and document all tattoos and piercings. If you want to reproduce or use drugs, alcohol, smoke, or get tats and piercings, then get a job.

Put me in charge of government housing. Ever live in a military barracks? You will maintain our property in a clean and good state of repair. Your "home" will be subject to inspections anytime and possessions will be inventoried. If you want a plasma TV or Xbox 360, then get a job and your own place.

In addition, you will either present a check stub from a job each week or you will report to a "government" job. It may be cleaning the roadways of trash, painting and repairing public housing, whatever we find for you We will sell your 22 inch rims and low profile tires and your blasting stereo and speakers and put that money toward the “common good.”

Before you write that I've violated someone's rights, realize that all of the above is voluntary. If you want our money, accept our rules. Before you say that this would be "demeaning" and ruin their "self esteem," consider that it wasn't that long ago that taking someone else's money for doing absolutely nothing was demeaning and lowered self esteem.

If we are expected to pay for other people's mistakes, we should at least attempt to make them learn from their bad choices. The current system rewards them for continuing to make bad choices.

AND While you are on Gov’t subsistence, you no longer can VOTE! Yes that is correct. For you to vote would be a conflict of interest. You will voluntarily remove yourself from voting while you are receiving a Gov’t welfare check. If you want to vote, then get a job.

ALL THIS SOUNDS REASONABLE TO ME_ HOW BOUT THE REST OF YA'LL???

Breaking News!!

2011-05-06T07:43:00.000-04:00

BREAKING NEWS: All mini marts, convenience stores, hotels, 7-11’s,and taxi cabs will be closed and not open for operation this week due to a death in the family.
All bars will extend their happy hour with a special drink called the "Bin Laden"....two shots and a splash!

Who Works in the USA?

2011-05-06T07:04:00.000-04:00

The population of this country is 300 million. 160 million are retired.

That leaves 140 million to do the work.

There are 85 million in school.

Which leaves 55 million to do the work.

Of this there are 35 million employed by the federal government.

Leaving 15 million to do the work.

2.8 million are in the armed forces

Which leaves 12.2 million to do the work.

Take from that total the 10.8 million people who work for state and city governments.

And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.

At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals.

Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.

Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.

That leaves just two people to do the work.

You and me

And there you are,

sitting on your ass,

at your computer, reading jokes.

Nice.

Real nice

What Do People Fear Most?

2011-05-04T07:20:00.000-04:00

WHAT DO PEOPLE FEAR MOST......

Two magazines, Country Living (95.99% white readership) and Ebony /Jet (99.99% black readership) did surveys on....

"WHAT DO PEOPLE FEAR MOST?" The results were interesting, to say the least....

Country Living magazine's top three answers were:
1. Nuclear war/terrorist attack in U.S
2. Child/spouse dying
3. Terminal illness

Ebony / Jet magazine's top three answers were:
1. Ghosts
2. Dogs
3. Registered mail

The Perks of Old Age!!!!

2011-04-21T07:43:00.001-04:00

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first...

3. People call at 9 PM and ask, 'Did I wake you?'

4. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

5. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

6. Things you buy now won't wear out...

7. You can eat supper at 4 PM...

8. You can live 'without sex, but not your glasses.

9. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

10. You sing along with elevator music.

11. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

12. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national Weather service.

13. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

A Short Love Story.....

2011-04-11T07:28:00.000-04:00

While out on a ride, I stopped at a nice park. I met a girl in the park that evening.

There was an instant spark between us and she immediately dropped to her knees and then laid down on the grass at my feet.

As we lay making love, I thought, "Wow! These Taser guns are well worth the money."

A Real Women......

2011-04-11T07:20:00.002-04:00

A Real Woman

A real woman is a man's best friend. She will never stand him up and never let him down. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day. She will inspire him to do things he never thought he could do; to live without fear and forget regret. She will enable him to express his deepest emotions and give in to his most intimate desires. She will make sure he always feels as though he's the most handsome man in the room and will enable him to be the most confident, sexy, seductive and invincible…....

No, wait...

Sorry. I'm thinking of whiskey.

It's whiskey that does all that. Never mind.

Wednesdays I Golf.....

2011-03-14T07:13:00.000-04:00

Ellen and her husband Bob went for counseling after 25 years of
marriage. When asked what the problem was, Ellen went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 25 years they had been married.
She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.
Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking Ellen to stand, embraced her, unbuttoned her blouse and bra, put his hands on her breasts and massaged them thoroughly, while kissing her passionately as her husband Bob watched with a raised eyebrow!
Ellen shut up, buttoned up her blouse, and quietly sat down while basking in the glow of being highly aroused.The therapist turned to Bob and said, 'This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?
Bob thought for a moment and replied, 'Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Fridays, but on Wednesday, I play golf".

I still can't figure out why they need counseling!! Meats

I Hate When He Is Right!

2011-03-09T06:58:00.000-05:00

Pops, I have been telling you for awhile that you need to stop listening to all of the propaganda and this is why. People twist the facts to justify their beliefs versus using the facts to determine their belief.

Start deleting all of the propaganda, and begin reading valid impartial sources. This is what's wrong with America as whole, people in general and a two party system. Until we fix BOTH parties, impose term limits, and call for ALL politicians to become accountable things will not change.

And no I am not a democrat, but I am also not a republican. I certainly am not a crazy Tea Partier. I am in favor of a system overhaul which begins with an up or out policy (2 terms and you move up the ranks or out of office) and a policy that if you plan on campaigning for a higher office you must vacate your post.

1. Career politicians - They pass laws that get votes, not laws that are better for America. They pass and shoot down laws that make headlines, not laws that make sense. If a politician knew the end was was coming they would do the right thing not the popular one.

2. On the campaign issue - I cannot tell my employer I want to leave for 9 months to campaign for a better job, and if I fail come back to my current position - why are politicians allowed this comfort? Not too mention they are collecting FULL benefits while on the campaign trail. They are, in the end, spending our tax dollars to do so.

The worst part is that things will not change until you Baby Boomers stop believing the propaganda spread by the party you have pledged allegiance too.

PS - Thanks for hanging us with a Social Security System that is worthless ;) You realize if they removed SS I could take that money, reinvest it myself in a mutual fund, as well as help boost a struggling economy, and have more to show for it upon retirement! Alas that would never pass because Congress would have less leverage to borrow more money from China. The Ponzi scheme that is our nation's system will not right itself until major changes are made.

Enough ranting from a 31 year old. Just remember - Politicians are supposed to be Civil Servants NOT Kings to be pampered. They work for us, not the other way around.

Your Son......James

Texas Sheriff Test

2011-03-07T07:20:00.000-05:00

A man in Texas looking to join the Frio County Sheriffs Dept. was being interviewed.

The Sergeant doing the interview says, "Your qualifications look good, but there's an attitude suitability test you must pass before you can be accepted." Then, sliding a Smith and Wesson 45 pistol across the desk, he says to the man, "Take this pistol; go out and shoot six illegal aliens, six meth dealers, six Muslim extremists, six 'Progressive Liberal' democrats, and a rabbit."

"Why the rabbit?" the man asked.

"Now that's the attitude we're looking for!" said the Sergeant, "When can you start?"

Gotta love Texas !

Starts with "F" and ends with "K"........

2011-03-07T06:58:00.000-05:00

A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students.. The teacher asked,�'Harry, what's your problem?'�

Harry answered, 'I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm�smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!'�

Ms.. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.�

While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed.�

Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he�agreed to take the test.�

Principal:�
'What is 3 x 3?'

Harry:�
'9.'�

Principal:�
'What is�6 x 6?'�

Harry:�
'36.'

And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know.�

The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her,�'I think Harry can go to the 3rd�grade'�

Ms. Brooks says to the principal,�'Let me ask him some questions..'�

The principal and Harry both agreed.�

Ms. Brooks asks,�'What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?'�

Harry, after a moment:�'Legs.'�

Ms Brooks:�'What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?'�

The principal wondered why would she ask such a question!�

Harry replied:�'Pockets.'�

Ms. Brooks:�'What does a dog do that a man steps into?'�

Harry:�
'Pants.'�

The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open.

Ms. Brooks:�'What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?'�

The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer, Harry replied,�'Bubble gum.'�

Ms. Brooks:�'What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a�dog does on three legs?'�

Harry:�'Shake hands.'�

The principal was trembling.�

Ms... Brooks:�'What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and�excitement?'

Harry:�
'Firetruck.'�

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the�
teacher,�'Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong..

Three Certain Things In Life

2011-01-26T07:42:00.000-05:00

Three(3) things in life are certain:

The madam opened the brothel door in Winnipeg and saw a rather dignified, well-dressed, good-looking man in his late forties or early fifties.

"May I help you sir?" she asked.

The man replied, "I want to see Valerie."

"Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else" said the madam.

He replied, "No, I must see Valerie." Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man she charged $5000 a visit.

Without hesitation, the man pulled out five thousand dollars and gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs.

After an hour, the man calmly left.

The next night, the man appeared again, once more demanding to see Valerie.

Valerie explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row as she was too expensive.

"There are no discounts. The price is still $5000."

Again, the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left.

The following night the man was there yet again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for a third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs. After their session, Valerie said to the man, "No one has ever been with me three nights in a row." "Where are you from?"

The man replied, " New Brunswick .."

Really," she said. "I have family in New Brunswick .."

"I know." the man said. "Your sister died, and I am her attorney." "She asked me to give you your

$15,000 inheritance."

The moral of the story is that three(3) things in life are certain:

1. Death

2. Taxes

3. Being screwed by a lawyer!

Shipwrecked....

2011-01-23T08:38:00.000-05:00

A man was washed up on a beach after a shipwreck. Only a sheep and a sheepdog were washed up with him. After looking around, he realized that they were stranded on a deserted island.

After being there awhile, he got into the habit of taking his two animal companions to the beach every evening to watch the sunset. One particular evening, the sky was a fiery red with beautiful cirrus clouds, the breeze was warm and gentle - a perfect night for romance.

As they sat there, the sheep started looking better and better to the lonely man. Soon, he leaned over to the sheep and put his arm around it.

But the sheepdog, ever protective of the sheep, growled fiercely until the man took his arm from around the sheep. After that, the three of them continued to enjoy the sunsets together, but there was no more cuddling.

A few weeks passed by and, lo and behold, there was another shipwreck. The only survivor was Nancy Pelosi. That evening, the man brought Nancy to the evening beach ritual. It was another beautiful evening - red sky, cirrus clouds, a warm and gentle breeze - perfect for a night of romance. Pretty soon, the man started to get those feelings again. He fought the urges as long as he could but he finally gave in and leaned over to Nancy and told her he hadn't had sex for months.

Nancy batted her eyelashes and asked if there was anything she could do for him.

He said, "Take the dog for a walk."

> I'm George Bush, and I approve this message.

Jade's1st CD just arrived!!!

2010-12-09T07:33:00.000-05:00

My daughter, Jade Lundgren, has just released her 1st CD called "Be Loved". It's fantastic, especially since she did it all on her own....sort of.....she had help from friends that knew the business to guide her, but none the less, put it all together and kept pushing forward to complete her dream come true! I'm very proud of her since she squeezed all of her song & music writing together while raising my two granddaughters! If you want to order some great "Christian Pop"music, go to http://www.jadelundgren.com/, you won't be disappointed!! Also, all feedback is welcome!

Yea!!! Tax cuts remain!

2010-12-09T07:22:00.000-05:00

Our President has finally seen the light.....increasing taxes in this environment would not be a very good idea. Even though the far left thinks he has jumped ship, he is really doing what is best for the American people...isn't that what all elected officials are supposed to do anyways? Extending unemployment compensation is also helping those who have not yet found work....I hardly think they want to be unemployed, although I'm sure some of them are working the system. Anyways, I'm glad he finally "grew a pair", and I hope it makes it through all the hurdles. I just can't understand how the far left can say no to this....they all want to take care of everyone, yet they don't want to give anything to the out of work people and allow the middle class to maintain their income! Will they ever make up their minds, or make any sense? Just balance the budget...stop the wasteful spending and do what is right for all Americans, and we'll be back to the way we were supposed to be and no longer out of control! Have a great day all of my fellow Americans.....until next time...God bless! Meats

Latest Trip

2010-11-16T07:10:00.000-05:00

Just got back from a 4 day trip to the Swan & Dolphin in Orlando....fantastic place to stay....lots of Steeler fans & met Ben Rothlesbergers best friend from Ohio who is the manager of the restaurant "Blue Zoo" at the Dolphin. Just Val & I alone for some R&R that was greatly needed!

You Could Have Heard A Pin Drop !

2010-09-08T07:15:00.002-04:00

A little history for you all:

When in England , at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was asked by the Archbishop of Canterbury if our plans for Iraq were just an example of empire building by George Bush...He answered by saying, "Over the years, the United States has sent many of its fine young men and women into great peril to fight for freedom beyond our borders. The only amount of land we have ever asked for in return is enough to bury those that did not return." You could have heard a pin drop.

There was a conference in France where a number of international engineers were taking part, including French and American. During a break, one of the French engineers came back into the room saying,"Have you heard the latest dumb stunt Bush has done? He has sent an aircraft carrier to Indonesia to help the tsunami victims. What does he intend to do, bomb them?" A Boeing engineer stood up and replied quietly,"Our carriers have three hospitals on board that can treat several hundred people; they are nuclear powered and can supply emergency electrical power to shore facilities; they have three cafeterias with the capacity to feed 3,000 people three meals a day, they can produce several thousand gallons offresh water from sea water each day, and they carry half a dozen helicopters for use in transporting victims and injured to and from their flight deck. We have eleven such ships; how many does France have? " You could have heard a pin drop.

A U.S. Navy Admiral was attending a naval conference that included Admirals from the U.S. , English, Canadian, Australian and French Navies. At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a large group of Officers that included personnel from most of those countries. Everyone was chatting away in English as they sipped their drinks but a French admiral suddenly complained that, whereas Europeans learn many languages, Americans learn only English. He then asked, "Why is it that we always have to speak English in these conferences rather than speaking French."Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied, "Maybe it's because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have to speak German." You could have heard a pin drop.

AND THIS STORY FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE ABOVE...Robert Whiting, an elderly gentleman of 83, arrived in Paris by plane. At French Customs, he took a few minutes to locate his passport in his carry on.."You have been to France before, monsieur?" the customs officer asked sarcastically. Mr. Whiting admitted that he had been to France previously." Then you should know enough to have your passport ready." The American said, ''The last time I was here, I didn't have to show it." "Impossible. Americans always have to show your passports on arrival in France ! "The American senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look. Then he quietly explained, ''Well, when I came ashore at Omaha Beach on D-Day in 1944 to help liberate this country, I couldn't find a single Frenchmen to show a passport to. "You could have heard a pin drop.

Difference between Potentially and Realistically.....

2010-08-17T07:23:00.001-04:00

A young boy went up to his father and asked him,'Dad, what is the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?' The father thought for a moment, then answered, 'Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then ask your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that.'
So the boy went to his mother and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?' The mother replied, 'Of course I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great University!'
The boy then went to his sister and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?' The girl replied, 'Oh my Gawd! I LOVE Brad Pitt I would sleep with him in a heartbeat, are you nuts?'
The boy then went to his brother and asked, 'Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?' 'Of course,' the brother replied. 'Do you know what a million bucks would buy?'
The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad. His father asked him, 'Did you find out the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?'The boy replied, 'Yes, 'Potentially', you and I are sitting on three million dollars. But 'realistically', we're living with two hookers and a queer.'

Men...Be Careful!!

2010-08-17T06:53:00.001-04:00

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties and local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman.
Many females use a date rape drug on the market called 'Beer.' The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large 'kegs'.
Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them. A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no strings attached sex. Men are rendered helpless against this approach.
After several beers, men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women whom they would never normally be attracted. After drinking beer, men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that 'something bad' occurred.
At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as 'a relationship.' In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of servitude and punishment referred to as 'marriage.' Men are much more susceptible to this scam after beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.
Please! Forward this warning to every male you know. If you fall victim to this 'Beer' scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men.
For the support group nearest you, just look up Golf Courses' in the phone book.

Origination of "You Gotta Be Shittin' Me"

2010-08-04T07:39:00.001-04:00

Have you ever wondered who first uttered the phrase 'You Gotta Be Shittin' Me''? Well, it just so happens to have originated through the Father of Our Country, way back when George Washington was crossing the Delaware River with his troops. There were 33 (remember this number) in Washington 's boat.
It was extremely dark and storming furiously and the water was tossing them about. Finally, Washington grabbed Corporal Peters and stationed him at the front of the boat with a lantern. He ordered him to keep swinging it, so they could see where they were heading. Corporal Peters, through driving rain and cold, continued swinging the lantern back and forth, back and forth. Then a big gust of wind and a wave hit and threw Corporal Peters and his lantern into the Delaware. Washington and his troops searched for nearly an hour trying to find Corporal Peters, but to no avail.
All of them felt terrible, for the Corporal had been one of their favorites. Sometime later, Washington and his troops landed on the other side, wet and totally exhausted. He rallied the troops and told them that they must go on. Another hour later, one of his men said, 'General, I see lights ahead.' They trudged toward the lights and came upon a huge house. What they didn't know was that this was a house of ill repute, hidden in the forest to serve all who came.
General Washington pounded on the door, his men crowding around him. The door swung open, and much to his surprise stood a beautiful woman. A huge smile came across her face, to see so many men standing there. Washington was the first to speak, 'Madam, I am General George Washington and these are my men. We are tired, wet, exhausted, and desperately need warmth and comfort.' Again, the Madam looked at all the men standing there, and with a broad smile on her face, said, 'Well, General, you have come to the right place. We can surely give you warmth and comfort. How many men do you have?' Washington replied, 'Well, Madam, there are 32 of us without Peters..' And the Madam said, 'You gotta be shittin me.'

Mixed Emotions.....true or false

2010-08-04T07:35:00.000-04:00

A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology and explaining the phenomenon of "mixed emotions". The husband turned to his wife and said, "Honey, that's a bunch of double-talk crap. I bet there isn't anything you could tell me that would make me happy and sad at the same time." She replied: ..."Out of all your friends, you have the biggest penis......"

Now that's funny!! Meats

We Never Learn!

2010-08-04T07:22:00.000-04:00

A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart.

The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.

'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.

'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans he replies.

'Put them back, we can't afford them demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.

A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.

What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.

'It’s my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.

Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price.'

On the PA system: 'Cleanup on aisle 25, we have a husband down.'

The Burned Face.....A Donated Butt ( ! )

2010-03-30T07:11:00.002-04:00

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter. After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the man's new face. He looked more handsome than he ever had before! All his friends and relatives just went on and on about his youthful beauty! One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion at her sacrifice. He said, 'Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?' 'My darling,' she replied, 'I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek.'

Pain Transfer During Childbirth!!

2010-02-11T17:49:00.003-05:00

A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said that the hospital was testing an amazing new high-tech machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the baby's father. He asked if they were interested, both said they were very much in favor of it.
The doctor set the pain transfer to 10 percent for starters, explaining that even 10 percent was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before. But as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and kick it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20 percent pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor then checked the husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this point they decided to try for 50 percent. The husband continued to feel quite well. Since the pain transfer was obviously helping the wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him.
The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain, and the husband had experienced none. She and her husband were ecstatic.
When they got home they found the UPS man dead on the porch......

I Couldn't Resist Posting This!!

2010-02-10T07:44:00.000-05:00

A Republican, in a wheelchair, entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Republican looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over there?"

The waitress nodded "yes," so the Republican requested that she give Jesus a cup of coffee, on him.

The next patron to come in was a Libertarian, with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus, over there?"

The waitress nodded, so the Libertarian asked her to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, "My treat."

The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Democrat on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, "Hey there honey! How's about gettin' me a cold mug of Miller Light?" He too looked across the restaurant and asked, "Isn't that God's boy over there?

The waitress nodded, so the Democrat directed her to give Jesus a cold beer. "On my bill," he said loudly.

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Republican, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Republican felt the strength come back into his legs, got up, and danced a jig out the door.

Jesus passed by the Libertarian, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Libertarian felt his back straightening up and he raised his hands, praised the Lord, and did a series of back flips out the door.

Then, Jesus walked towards the Democrat, just smiling.

The Democrat jumped up and yelled, "Don't touch me ... I'm collecting disability."

And Then The Fight Started!!

2010-01-27T07:32:00.000-05:00

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?' I said, 'Dust.' And then the fight started...
******************************************
My wife and I were watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?" "No," she answered. I then said, "Is that your final answer?" She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, "Yes." So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend." And then the fight started....
******************************************
Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible." My loving wife of 5 years replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?" And that's how the fight started...
******************************************
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get so stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... He was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, "I AM NOT HAPPY!!!" So, I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?" And then the fight started.....
*****************************************
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.' I bought her a bathroom scale. And then the fight started...
******************************************
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her some place expensive... so, I took her to a gas station. And then the fight started...
******************************************
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's License to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.' And then the fight started...
******************************************
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed, 'she’s my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.' 'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?' And then the fight started...
******************************************
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason took my order first. "I'll have the steak, medium rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"" Nah, she can order for herself." And then the fight started...
******************************************
A woman was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to her husband, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.' The husband replied, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.' And then the fight started.....

Go Figure!!

2010-01-22T07:34:00.004-05:00

LET ME SEE IF I UNDERSTAND ALL OF THIS...
IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET 12 YEARS HARD LABOR.
IF YOU CROSS THE IRANIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY. IF YOU CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET SHOT.
IF YOU CROSS THE SAUDI ARABIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE JAILED.
IF YOU CROSS THE CHINESE BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU MAY NEVER BE HEARD FROM AGAIN.
IF YOU CROSS THE VENEZUELAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE BRANDED A SPY AND YOUR FATE WILL BE SEALED.
IF YOU CROSS THE CUBAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE THROWN INTO POLITICAL PRISON TO ROT.
IF YOU CROSS MEXICO'S SOUTHERN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE SHOT AT, BEATEN, JAILED THEN, PERHAPS, SENT BACK.
IF YOU CROSS THE U.S. BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET:
1. A JOB,
2. A DRIVERS LICENSE,
3. A SOCIAL SECURITY CARD
4. CREDIT CARDS,
5. SUBSIDIZED RENT OR A LOAN TO BUY A HOUSE,
6. FREE EDUCATION,
7. FREE HEALTH CARE
8. A LOBBYIST IN WASHINGTON AND
9. IN MANY INSTANCES YOU CAN EVEN VOTE!

Women Never Change!

2010-01-21T07:14:00.000-05:00

A very old man lay dying in his bed. In death's doorway, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookie wafting up the stairs.
He gathered his remaining strength and lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort forced himself down the stairs, gripping the railing with both hands.
With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen. Were it not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven.
There, spread out on newspapers on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite chocolate chip cookies.
Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?
Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself toward the table. The aged and withered hand, shaking, made its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when he was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife.
"Stay out of those," she said. "They're for the funeral.

The Husband Store!

2010-01-20T07:20:00.004-05:00

A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates: You may visit this store ONLY ONCE!

There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.' So she continues upward . The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking. 'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth f loor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!' Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.
Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

PLEASE NOTE: To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

Compounding Interest......

2010-01-20T07:02:00.002-05:00

TWENTY DOLLARS

On their wedding night, the young bride Approached her new husband and asked For $20.00 for their first lovemaking Encounter. In his highly aroused state, Her husband readily agreed.

This scenario was repeated each time they made Love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking that it was a Cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that She needed.

Arriving home around noon one day, she was Surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state. During the next few minutes, he explained that His employer was going through a process of corporate Downsizing, and he had been let go.

It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find Another position that paid anywhere near what He'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which Showed more than thirty years of steady deposits and interest totaling Nearly $1 million. Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued By the bank which were worth over $2 million, And informed him that they Were one of the largest depositors in the bank. She explained that for more than Three decades she had 'charged' him for sex, these holdings had multiplied and these were the Results of her savings and investments.

Faced with evidence of cash and investments Worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could Barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out, 'If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business!'

That's when she shot him! Men can say the stupidest things sometimes!!

Thought You Should Know....

2009-08-04T06:29:00.001-04:00

The real names of Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis were....Dino Paul Croccetti and Jerome Levitch! Good thing they changed them! Meats

Call An Electrician!

2009-07-08T07:19:00.001-04:00

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Do I Need An Electrician?":

Thanks Meats.
It seems to be all over my house, but in very specific sockets. I also have two of those outlets with the testers on them on opposite sides of the house that I can't plug anything into without them tripping. Something is at work here... and since I wrote you the last question the light sensor on my front porch light fried!
I will definitely try some lower wattage bulbs. Green, you say? Do you mean those twisty looking ones? (I think that's the technical description of them... twisty...)
This has been an ongoing problem since I moved in several years ago. It's getting old.

Dear Anonymous.....CALL AN ELECTRICIAN IMMEDIATELY......YOU DON'T NEED A FIRE !
Meats

Do I Need An Electrician?

2009-07-02T07:11:00.003-04:00

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post:

Thanks for the answer. I was hoping you'd say that. I have one more silly question... I have certain areas of the house where light bulbs burn out more quickly than others. This is perplexing..........
What do you think is causing this? Do I need an electrician? And... if I leave a burned out light bulb in the socket, does it still draw electricity? (I'm just really curious about that last question. Don't know if it's better to take it out or leave it.)

Dear Anonymous,
Since you didn't say which area of your home it was that they were burning out faster in, there may be moisture or more fluctuation in temperatures that could be causing the problem. Before you call an electrician, try the new low wattage "green" bulbs that are on the market and see if they last longer. If the problem continues, call an electrician because there may be a surge going on in your service or that section of your home.
As to the question of drawing electricity from a burned out bulb....NO....it is as if you turned off a light switch. When there is no connection between the filament, the flow is broken and no electricity is being used.
Let me know the outcome, and thanks for the question!
Meats

An Old Cowboy!

2009-07-01T21:05:00.002-04:00

Got this in an email & thought you'd all enjoy it!

An old cowboy sat down at the Starbucks and ordered a cup of coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the cowboy and asked, 'Are you a real cowboy?' He replied, 'Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy.'
She said, 'I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women. When I shower, I think about women. When I watch TV, I think about women. I even think about women when I eat. It seems that everything makes me think of women.' The two sat sipping in silence. A little while later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, 'Are you a real cowboy?' He replied, 'I always thought I was, but I just found out that I'm a lesbian.' LOL Meats

Water/Sewage Line Insurance?

2009-06-24T06:11:00.003-04:00

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post:

Meats,
Do you have water and/or sewer line insurance? Is it wise to have it? What do you think is a good price? I got an offer for $14 a month for both. I'm tempted, even though cash is tight. What the heck would I do if I had to pay someone to dig up my yard? Or is this so unlikely to happen that I'm wasting my money?

Dear Anonymous,
No, I don't have water/sewer line insurance.....actually I think it is a waste of money. How often do you hear about water or sewer lines breaking? It may be the responsibility of the water/sewage authority in most cases. I've owned 10 different properties since 1978, and not one of them ever needed the water or sewage line replaced! Just put the $14 a month into a money market account, and after 10 years, apply the saved money towards a vacation because you still won't have used it on your water or sewage line!! Thanks for the question....Meats

Your Age Calculation....

2009-06-18T07:30:00.004-04:00

Don't tell me your age; you probably would lie anyway -but the "Meats Man" will know!

YOUR AGE:

1. First, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate (more than once but less than 10)

2. Multiply this number by 2

3. Add 5

4. Multiply it by 50 -- I'll wait while you get the calculator

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1759 ..If you haven't , add 1758.

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.

You should now have a three digit number.........

The first digit of this was your original number (i.e., how many times you want to have chocolate each week).

The next two numbers are.....

YOUR AGE! (Oh YES, it is!!!!!)

THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2009) IT WILL EVER WORK, SO SPREAD IT AROUND WHILE IT LASTS.

The "Meats Man" knows all!

Math from 1959 to 2009

2009-05-31T08:43:00.003-04:00

Fifty Years of Math 1959 - 2009 (in the USA )
Last week I purchased a burger at Burger King for $1.58. The counter girl took my $2 and I was digging for my change when I pulled 8 cents from my pocket and gave it to her. She stood there, holding the nickel and 3 pennies, while looking at the screen on her register. I sensed her discomfort and tried to tell her to just give me two quarters but she hailed the manager for help. While he tried to explain the transaction to her, she stood there and cried. Why do I tell you this?Because of the evolution in teaching math since the 1950s:
1. Teaching Math In 1950s: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit ?
2. Teaching Math In 1960s: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit?
3. Teaching Math In 1970s: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80. Did he make a profit?
4. Teaching Math In 1980s: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20.
5. Teaching Math In 1990sA logger cuts down a beautiful forest because he is selfish and inconsiderate and cares nothing for the habitat of animals or the preservation of our woodlands. He does this so he can make a profit of $20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class participation after answering the question: How did the birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down their homes? (There are no wrong answers, and if you feel like crying, it's ok. )
6. Teaching Math In 2009: Un hachero vende una carretada de maderapara $100. El costo de la producciones es $80. Cuanto dinero ha hecho? LOL Meats!

Murphy's Law!!

2009-05-13T07:47:00.001-04:00

Thought some of you out there may enjoy this!

OH Lord, I'M TIRED!
A man was sick and tired of going to work every day whilehis wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he wentthrough, so he prayed: 'Dear Lord: I go to work every day and put in 8 hourswhile my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know whatI go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day Amen.'God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish. The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman. - He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, Awakened the kids, Set out their school clothes, Fed them breakfast, Packed their lunches, Drove them to school, Came home and Picked up the dry cleaning, Took it to the cleaners and Stopped at the bank to make a deposit, Went grocery shopping, Then drove home to put away the groceries, Paid the bills and Balanced the check book.He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog. Then it was already 1P.M. And he hurried to make the beds, Do the laundry,Vacuum, Dust, and Sweep and Mop the kitchen floor. Ran to the school to pick up the kids and Got into an argument with them on the way home. Set out milk and cookies and Got the kids organized to do their homework, Then set up the ironing board and Watched TV while he did the ironing. At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and Washing vegetables for salad, Breaded the pork chops and Snapped fresh beans for supper. After supper, he cleaned the kitchen, Ran the dishwasher, Folded laundry, Bathed the kids, and put them to bed. At 9 P.M. He was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get through without complaint. The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said: -'Lord, I don't know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day. Please, oh! Oh! Please, let us trade back.' The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied: 'My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were. You'll just have to wait nine months though, you got pregnant last night.' LOL Meats

A Miracle!

2009-04-21T07:38:00.003-04:00

I got this in an e-mail & thought you all may enjoy...

A Boy Singing to his little sister... You are My Sunshine, My only.. Sunshine'... Like any good mother, when Karen found out that another baby was on the way, she did what she could to help her 3-year-old son, Michael, prepare for a new sibling. They found out that the new baby was going be a girl, and day after day, night after night, Michael sang to his sister in mommy's tummy. He was building a bond of love with his little sister before he even met her. The pregnancy progressed normally for Karen, an active member of the Panther Creek United Methodist Church in Morristown , Tennessee. In time, the labor pains came. Soon it was every five minutes, every three, every minute. But serious complications arose during delivery and Karen found herself in hours of labor. Would a C-section be required? Finally, after a long struggle, Michael's little sister was born. But she was in very serious condition. With a siren howling in the night, the ambulance rushed the infant to the neonatal intensive care unit at St. Mary's Hospital, Knoxville , Tennessee The days inched by.. The little girl got worse. The pediatrician had to tell the parents there is very little hope. Be prepared for the worst. Karen and her husband contacted a local cemetery about a burial plot. They had fixed up a special room in their house for their new baby but now they found themselves having to plan for a funeral. Michael, however, kept begging his parents to let him see his sister. I want to sing to her, he kept saying. Week two in intensive care looked as if a funeral would come before the week was over. Michael kept nagging about singing to his sister, but kids are never allowed in Intensive Care. Karen decided to take Michael whether they liked it or not. If he didn't see his sister right then, he may never see her alive. She dressed him in an oversized scrub suit and marched him into ICU. He looked like a walking laundry basket. The head nurse recognized him as a child and bellowed, 'Get that kid out of here now. No children are allowed..' The mother rose up strong in Karen, and the usually mild-mannered lady glared steel-eyed right into the head nurse's face, her lips a firm line. 'He is not leaving until he sings to his sister' she stated. Then Karen towed Michael to his sister's bedside. He gazed at the tiny infant losing the battle to live. After a moment, he began to sing. In the pure-hearted voice of a 3-year-old, Michael sang: 'You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray.' Instantly the baby girl seemed to respond. The pulse rate began to calm down and become steady. 'Keep on singing, Michael,' encouraged Karen with tears in her eyes. 'You never know, dear, how much I love you, please don't take my sunshine away.' As Michael sang to his sister, the baby's ragged, strained breathing became as smooth as a kitten's purr 'Keep on singing, sweetheart.' 'The other night, dear, as I lay sleeping, I dreamed I held you in my arms' Michael's little sister began to relax as rest, healing rest, seemed to sweep over her. 'Keep on singing, Michael.' Tears had now conquered the face of the bossy head nurse. Karen glowed. 'You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. Please don't take my sunshine away.' The next day...the very next day, the little girl was well enough to go home. Woman's Day Magazine called it The Miracle of a Brother's Song. The medical staff just called it a miracle. Karen called it a miracle of God's love.
LOVE IS SO INCREDIBLY POWERFUL..... Life is good..... Have a Wonderful Day! Meats

How To Fix The Economy......

2009-04-21T07:26:00.004-04:00

This is from an article in the St. Petersburg Times Newspaper:

The Business Section asked readers for ideas on "How Would You Fix The Economy ?" I think this guy nailed it!

Dear Mr. President:

Please find below my suggestion for fixing America 's economy. Instead of giving billions of dollars to companies that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan. You can call it the "Patriotic Retirement Plan":

There are about 40 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them $1 million apiece severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:

1) They MUST retire. Forty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.
2) They MUST buy a new American CAR. Forty million cars ordered - Auto Industry fixed.
3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - Housing Crisis fixed.

It can't get any easier than that! If more money is needed, have all members of Congress and their constituents pay their taxes...

Now that is something to think about!!! Meats

Life....finally explained!!!

2009-04-19T20:13:00.002-04:00

On the first day, God created the dog and said: 'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.' The dog said: 'That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?' So God agreed.
On the second day, God created the monkey and said: 'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.' The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years? Tha t's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?' And God agreed.
On the third day, God created the cow and said: 'You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty ye ars.' The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?' And God agreed again.
On the fourth day, God created man and said: 'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years.' But man said: 'Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten The dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?' 'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'
So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.
Life has now been explained to you.
There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service.

Tips From the Redneck Book of Manners.....

2009-04-07T07:31:00.004-04:00

General Info:
1. Never take a beer to a job interview
2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them.
3. It's considered poor taste to take a cooler to church.
4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets.
5. Even if you're certain that you are included in the will, it is still considered tacky to drive a U- Haul to the funeral home.

Dining Out:
1. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label.
2. Avoid throwing bones and food scraps on the floor as the restaurant may not have dogs.

Entertaining In Your Home:
1. A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist.
2. Do not allow the dog to eat at the table no matter how good his manners are.

Personal Hygiene:
1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck keys
2. Proper use of toiletries can forestall bathing for several days. However, if you live alone, deodorant is a waste of good money.
3. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a social no-no, as they tend to detract from a woman's jewelry and alter the taste of finger foods.

Dating (outside the family):
1. Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date.
2. Be aggressive. Let her know you're interested: 'I've been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the bathroom wall two years ago.'
3. Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say 10:00 PM; others might say 'Monday.' If the latter is the answer, it is the man's responsibility to get her to school on time.
4. Always have a positive comment about your date's appearance, such as, 'Ya'll sure don't sweat much for a fat gal.'

Weddings:
1. Livestock, usually, is a poor choice for a wedding gift.
2. Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds may get you shot.
3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean bowling shirt can create too sporty an appearance.
4. Though uncomfortable, say 'yes' to socks and shoes for this special occasion.
5. It is not appropriate to tell the groom how good his wife is in the sack.

Driving Etiquette:
1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded, and the deer is in sight.
2. When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of way.
3. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.
4. When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer.
5. Never relieve yourself from a moving vehicle, especially when driving.
6. Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.

Two Reasons why it is hard to solve a Redneck Murder:
1. All the DNA is the same.
2. There are no dental records

Don't Sweat Your 401k.....

2009-04-02T06:29:00.003-04:00

Strapped has left a new comment on your post:
Meats,
I have a complicated financial question. I used to work for a public company. I had a 401k and ESOP with them. When I went to work for a private company, I left my stuff alone, figuring it would do better where it was. My old company went private some time ago, and I considered rolling over my stuff, but things came up, and blah blah blah. The economy then tanked, and I'm losing money, as expected.
So, my first question: Would I have been better off if I had rolled it over when they went private? I am under the impression it would have been dormant if I had, but maybe I'm wrong. I have no financial sense whatsoever.
Second question: I hear rumors that my old company may file for bankruptcy now... is it possible to lose my 401k if that happens? I'd like to keep it there until I recoup my losses, but I don't want to lose it altogether.
Thanks for any advice you can give me.

Dear Strapped,
Don't sweat the small stuff......we've all lost 20% to 30% in the market in the past 7 months! But, the good news is that you don't have to fear losing all of your investment. The government set up regulations that your 401k money must be held and invested by a third party, and you are the one to tell them how you want your money invested! Even if your company, or your prior employer goes bankrupt, your money is safe.....unless Madoff had it!! If you are going to retire within 5 years, have them put your money into safer investments to preserve your capital, but if you have many years to go until retirement, don't touch it....the market will come back!! It may take a couple of years, but I predict the market will be back over 10,000 by the summer of 2010. Thanks for the question! Meats

Atheist Holiday!

2009-03-18T07:51:00.000-04:00

FLORIDA COURT SETS ATHEIST HOLY DAY In Florida
An atheist created a case against the upcoming Easter and Passover holy days. He hired an attorney to bring a discrimination case against Christians, Jews and observances of their holy days. The argument was that it was unfair that atheists had no such recognized Days. The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the passionate Presentation by the lawyer, the judge banged his gavel declaring,"Case Dismissed!" The lawyer immediately stood objecting to the ruling saying, "Your honor, How can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and others. The Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah, yet my Client and all other atheists have no such holidays." The judge leaned forward in his chair saying, "But you do. Your client, Counsel, is woefully ignorant." The lawyer said, "Your Honor, we are unaware of any special observance or holiday for atheists." The judge said, "The calendar says April 1st is April Fools Day. Psalm 14:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, it is the opinion of this court, that if your client says there is no God, then he is a fool. Therefore, April 1st is his day. Court is Adjourned. You gotta love a Judge that knows his scripture!

Are you God's Wife......

2009-03-09T07:40:00.002-04:00

Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child.

The winner was: A four-year-old child, whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman, who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy wen t into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his mother asked him what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy just said, ' Nothing, I just helped him cry. '
*********************************************
Teacher Debbie Moon's first graders were discussing a picture of a family. One little boy in the picture had a different hair color than the other members. One of her students suggested that he was adopted. A little girl said, ' I know all about adoption, I was adopted.. ' ' What does it mean to be adopted? ' , asked another child. ' It means ', said the girl, ' that you grew in your mommy's heart instead of her tummy! '
*********************************************
On my way home one day, I stopped to watch a Little League baseball game that was being played in a park near my home. As I sat down behind the bench on the first- base line, I asked one of the boys what the score was ' We 're behind 14 to nothing, ' he answered with a smile. ' Really, ' I said. ' I have to say you don ' t look very discouraged. ' ' Discouraged? ' , the boy asked with a puzzled look on his face... ' Why should we be discouraged? We haven 't been up to bat yet. '
********* ***************** *******************
Whenever I ' m disappointed with my spot in life, I stop and think about little Jamie Scott. Jamie was trying out for a part in the school play. His mother told me that he'd set his heart on being in it, though she feared he would not be chosen. On the day the parts were awarded, I went with her to collect him after school. Jamie rushed up to her, eyes shining with pride and excitement. ' Guess what, Mom, ' he shouted, and then said those words that will remain a lesson to me..... " I've been chosen to clap and cheer."
*********************************************
An eye witness account from New York City, on a cold day in December, some years ago: A little boy, about 10-years-old, wa s standing before a shoe store on the roadway, barefooted, peering through the window, and shivering with cold. A lady approached the young boy and said, ' My, but you're in such deep thought staring in that window! ' ' I was asking God to give me a pair of shoes,' was the boy's reply. The lady took him by the hand, went into the store, and asked the clerk to get half a dozen pair of socks for the boy. She then asked if he could give her a basin of water and a towel. He quickly brought them to her.. She took the little fellow to the back part of the store and, removing her gloves, knelt down, washed his little feet, and dried them with the towel.By this time, the clerk had returned with the socks. Placing a pair upon the boy's feet, she purchased him a pair of shoes. She tied up the remaining pairs of socks and gave them to him.. She patted him on the head and said, ' No doubt, you will be more comfortable now.. ' As she turned to go, the astonished kid caught her by the hand, and looking up in to her face, with tears in his eyes, asked her. ' Are you God's wife? '

The Economy

2009-02-25T07:28:00.002-05:00

Well everyone......are we going to pull out of this recession soon? Did the president relay enough confidence to the American public to boost the economy? Is it really as bad as it seems, or are people getting laid off, just in case it gets worse for these companies? An interesting fact...... Pittsburgh is the 4th best real estate market in the country! Not in sales, but in value. The reason, I believe, is that we never experienced the real estate boom (false appreciation) that the rest of the country had. We just had a steady 1% or 2% increase per year on our homes over the past 10 years, so what we sell our homes for right now is actually what they are worth! Rock on Pittsburgh! Six Super Bowls....come on Pens, kick it up a notch and you'll be in the playoffs!! Meats

Useless Information!!

2009-02-16T13:24:00.002-05:00

Strange Body Statistics ...
It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach.
One human hair can support 6 lb.
The average man's penis is three times the length of his thumb.
Human thighbones are stronger than concrete.
A woman's heart beats faster than a man's.
There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.
Women blink twice as often as men.
The average person's skin weighs twice as much as the brain.
Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still.
If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.
Women reading this will be finished now.
Men who read this are still checking their thumbs!!

More Than One Meats?

2009-02-11T06:53:00.002-05:00

Crazy4AZ has left a new comment on your post "Crazy4AZ Responds To Our Win!":
MeatS-
Is there more than one of you?
Crazy

Dear Crazy,
No....just me, but I sure could use another of me around the house! It's just a Crazy nickname I picked up as a kid many, many years ago, and it stuck! Now, with the weight I've gained, as I've gotten older, I think I've grown into my nickname!! Meats

Crazy4AZ Responds To Our Win!

2009-02-05T07:11:00.002-05:00

Crazy4AZ has left a new comment on your post "Kurtis the stockboy & Brenda the checkout girl...":
Meat,
Congrats on the W. I guess Pittsburg deserves 6 Super Bowls more than we deserve 1. It was a good game. I won't even comment on the officiating.Lata,CrazyPS- Did Kurtis the stockboy ever take you up on your offer?

Dear Crazy,

First.....it's MEATS....plural!! Next, I thought you had us there for a minute....then I regained my composure and realized Big Ben was in control! Santonio's ballet classes have come in handy!! I wish Kurt had taken me up on the offer, but I never heard from him.....I don't have that may followers of my blog to get the word out. He sure is a great guy and there was not too much more he could have done to try and bring his team to a victory.....it just wasn't meant to be. Thanks for the comments....keep them coming & tell your friends about my blog!! Meats

Smelly Freezer!!

2009-01-24T19:22:00.002-05:00

Meats,
Here is my question, and it is very important to me, so I'd like as good of an answer as you can. My freezer has this "smell" to it that is rather odd. It is sort of a soapy, chemical smell that permeates everything in the freezer, if it's in there long enough. It is strongest in the ice cubes. I actually think we can smell it even a little bit in the fridge. It is tainting our drinks and I have a bad feeling about it. (I was warned once that the piping that leads to the ice cube makers can be a bad plastic part that causes cancer..crazy I know). Can you think of what it could be? Can you think of how we could fix this?
You are the BEST Meats!!
Love you, jade

Dear Jade,

After extensive research, Meats has decided that the best way to rid your freezer of any smells is Baking soda.....yes baking soda. Be sure that you don't have any rotting or spoiled food in the freezer, then take everything out and wipe it out with a little baking soda and water. Sprinkle some baking soda into a bowl (just dry, not in water) and place it in the freezer. It will absorb the bad odor.....if the odor persists, then you can check the plastic water line. Since your refriderator is only a little over a year old, I doubt that it would be that. But, if it does continue to smell, then disconnect the water line to the ice maker and see if it was the root of the problem.
One more tidbit of information that you didn't ask for.....if your tennis shoes stink, sprinkle the inside with.......baking soda!!! Thanks for the question......you know I'll be there to fix it for you! Love, Meats

Crazy4AZ is...Shall I Say....Crazy!!

2009-01-21T06:46:00.003-05:00

Crazy4AZ has left a new comment on your post "Why the Steelers Must Win the Super Bowl!!":
Meat,
First off let me just say that that you boyz from the burgh are in for a serious awakening come Superbowl sunday. Every single team has underestimated the Cardinals and the Steelers will do the same. I can't wait to watch Dick LaBow try to blitz Kurt Warner. Let me tell you, he will respond a lot better than Joe Flacko did. Until now, the only thing Arizona had to thank Pittsburg for was Larry Fitzgerald, but now we are going to add a superbowl victory to that! Thanks, you guys are the best =)
See you in two weeks,
Crazy4AZ

Dear Crazy,
Your name says it all......Crazy!! We will not underestimate the Cardinals...they will be the main course!! The Ravens were just the appetizer!! Kurt Warner is a great guy, but who can compare to Big Ben? Once Fitzgerald takes a few hits from the likes of Clark, Troy, Farrior & Harrison, the rest will be history! I just hope Fitzgerald doesn't get hurt....he has a great future ahead of him!! Thanks for the comment.....get back to me in a few weeks so you can then eat crow......or should I say Cardinal!! Meats

Why the Steelers Must Win the Super Bowl!!

2009-01-18T14:28:00.002-05:00

Interesting e-mail I received!!

Members of the Steeler Nation know all too well the story of the Terrible Towel. It was a brainchild of beloved and dearly departed Myron Cope during the Noll Dynasty. The magic of the towel lasted beyond the retirement of Chuck Noll, maintained its staying power throughout the entire Cowher age, and is still going strong in the early years of the Tomlin era.
The towels are manufactured in Wisconsin by Chippewa River Industries. Proceeds from the sale of the towels benefit Chippewa, which employs the mentally disabled, and helps to pay for their care. Myron Cope also collected royalties and donated all of them to the Allegheny Valley School, a special needs place where his autistic son is a resident. Before he died, Cope bequeathed the Towel rights to the school, ensuring proper care for his son and for many others. What you may not know is that greed has found its way in to this benevolent endeavor. The NFL is quietly working on a promotion to produce larger towels for every other team in the league besides the Steelers. They plan to unveil this gimmick after the conference championships this week and push it through the super bowl. The plan is to market these towels and capture the enthusiasm of the super bowl contestants. To get things moving, free towels were handed out at every stadium during the divisional playoffs this week. You may have seen the Tennessee fans waving those powder blue things. Of course, they would not have brought their own. Did anyone notice the complete backfire? All the home teams lost EXCEPT the Steelers! This is why the Steelers need to win the Superbowl. The sanctity of the Terrible Towel must be preserved!
Also of note: After the 2005 season members of the Cincinnati Bengals, AFC North division champs, stomped all over the Terrible Towel before their playoff game with the wild card Steelers. The Bengals still have not recovered from their loss that day. The Steelers went on to win their Fifth Super Bowl. On Dec. 21, 2008 members of the Titans stomped on the towel. Three weeks later, the Titans took an early dismissal from the playoffs. Early on in that game with the Ravens, many fans were waving their freebie blue towels marked TITANS! Later, as the rain began to fall, and it got colder, they put the towels on their necks to stay warm. Appropriately, as the game went on, their necks began to TIGHTEN! And their team choked.
If the Steelers win the Superbowl this year, they will have to win two games against teams named after birds. Then the opposing fans can use their new towels to clean up all the bird poop! Also, a Steeler Super Bowl victory will make the sacrilegious theft of the spirit of the Terrible Towel the worst marketing idea since the NFL network! GO STEELERS !

Meats

Steelers VS Ravens Bet!!

2009-01-15T18:34:00.003-05:00

Meats,
I am curious and wanted a Pittsburghian’s insight as to what might happen WHEN the Ravens come into Heinz field and beat the Stillers? Should we expect to see rioting? Cars burning? Looting? How will James handle this?
Always,
Booth

Dear Booth,
Have you lost your friggin mind?!! Even if I would think the Steelers could lose, and admit it on my blog, my car would be burnt, my house would be looted and me my wife and kids would be strung up!! But, even in your little "pipe dream" do you honestly think that the Ravens have a chance to win?!!! I'm not sure how James would handle a loss, but I'll bet that if the Steelers loose, he and Becky will take you, and your significant other, out to dinner at the Inner Harbor. But, when.....and the key word is when...... they win, you then will have to take them out to dinner at the restaurant of their choice!! If you agree to these terms, call James and inform him of the bet I just made for him!!! If he won't agree, and the Steelers loose, then Val and I will have you, and your significant other, up to the 'Burg for the weekend, a cookout on the deck, and plenty of drinks!!
Take care and thanks for participating in my crazy blog!
Your Friends Crazy Dad..........Meats

What's Up?

2009-01-15T06:50:00.002-05:00

Are you all ready for more Useless Information? Here it comes!!

The little two letter word "up" has more meaning than any other of our two letter words. If you're not confused after reading this, then you must be really messed "up"!!

It's easy to understand "up", meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we waken in the morning, why do we wake "up"? At a meeting, why does a topic come "up"? Why do we speak "up", and why are the officers "up" for election, and why is it "up" to the secretary to write "up" a report? We call "up" our friends, we use paint to brighten "up" a room, we polish "up" the silver, we warm "up" the leftovers, and clean "up" the kitchen. We lock "up" the house, and some guys fix "up" the old car. People stir "up" trouble, line "up" for tickets, work "up" an appetite, and think "up" excuses. To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed "up" is special! A drain must be opened "up" because it is stopped "up". We open "up" a store in the morning, but we close it "up" at night. When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding "up". When the sun comes out, we say it is clearing "up". When it rains, it wets "up" the earth & when it doesn't rain, things dry "up". We really seem to be pretty mixed "up" about "up"!

Now you all will have to excuse me while I head "up" the stairs to clean "up" for work, and then head "up" the driveway to start "up" my car and head "up" to the firehall to finish "up" my audit! I hope you all have a great day and don't forget to keep your chin "up"!!!

Meats

What You Don't Have In Your Hand, You Can't Hold!!

2009-01-10T16:31:00.006-05:00

Dane has left a new comment on your post "World's Shortest Fairy Tale!!":

but were they happy??

Dear Dane,

How could anyone be happy without a better half? First comes kids then the grandkids and before you know it you don't even care who controls the TV, you just hope for a good night's sleep! Just to be abe to sit around, drink beer and martini's, control the remote and then pass gas when you want, surely does not make for a happy person!! If that is all it would take to make someone happy, then no one would ever get married!! Besides, if I want to fart, Val can't stop me!! Her grandfather used to say "What you don't have in your hand, you can't hold"!! Keep that in mind the next time you let one rip under the covers!! Meats

World's Shortest Fairy Tale!!

2009-01-07T06:55:00.002-05:00

I got this e-mail and had to pass it on.......

The World's Shortest Fairy Tale:

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl said, 'NO!' And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted.

THE END

Meat's version for women......

Once upon a time, a girl was asked for her hand in marriage. The girl said "NO" and she lived happily ever after.....went shopping, played tennis alot, got her nails done when she wanted, drank apple martinis and wine, the toilet seat was always down, had the remote control in bed and farted whenever she wanted.

THE END !!

God, George Carlin & Rocks!

2008-12-30T18:51:00.003-05:00

Meats,
Here's a question that you or one of your other experts may be able to answer: George Carlin used to ask the nuns at parochial school "Since God is all-powerful, can he make a rock so heavy that even he can't lift it?"
Regards and Happy New Year!
Lou

Dear Lou,
First, thanks for reading my blog and asking a question......no matter how absurd!! Anyway, I hope George is having fun in Heaven lifting rocks! I think since God is all powerful, he could, if he wanted too, make a rock so heavy He couldn't lift it! But then again, does a spirit have to lift anything? I don't think that in the scope of things that it really matters if God could do that or not.......I just hope I'll have the pleasure of spending eternity with him! Meats

Joanie Loves Chachi!?

2008-12-29T07:04:00.002-05:00

Ok, here is some more "Useless Information".........The first episode of "Joanie Loves Chachi" was the highest rated U.S. television episode in the history of Korean television. Chachi is Korean for "penis." I bet there were alot of disappointed Koreans that day!!! Meats

Mom's A Keeper!!

2008-12-27T12:51:00.003-05:00

Dad,
Very nice. I am glad that revitalizing your blog is going to be a focus this New Years. Mom will not be too happy, but she may never understand what we do about how enjoyable the internet is. She's stuck in time in the 80s or 90s. But her cooking is timeless, so we should keep her, right?
Love you Dad,
jade

Dear Jade,
Don't tell Mom that I'm trying to get my blog going strong again....she may leave me!! She hates computers but maybe some day she will understand the true meaning of blogs, web sites and facebook and how much fun it can be! The extra weight I carry around truely is from her fine cooking!! She is definitely a keeper!!
Love.....Dad (Meats)

Merry Christmas...Happy New Year..& Useless Info

2008-12-26T07:05:00.003-05:00

Merry Christmas to all of my loyal blogger friends and family out there! We had a wonderful Christmas full of family and friends but we can't wait until next weekend when our kids and their spouses and our grandchildren can be with us to celebrate Christmas and my wife's and my birthday's! OK, I know everyone wants to know what I got for Christmas......are you ready.....clothes, electric razor, socks and best of all.....a book of amazing useless information!! And guess what? I'll be sharing with all of you the useless information!! Now, I know just how excited all of you are, so here goes with the beginning of a long series of "Useless Information"

"Second string," meaning "replacement or backup," comes from the Middle Ages. An archer always carried a second string in case the one on his bow broke.

That's it for today! I hope all of you enjoyed my first piece of "Useless Information"! Thanks for reading my blog and I want to wish all of my family and friends a Happy and Healthy New Year! Meats

How Many Zeros in a Billion???

2008-12-07T20:39:00.002-05:00

I received this in an e-mail...thought you may find it interesting!!
Meats.....

The next time you hear a politician use the word 'billion' in a casual manner, think about whether you want the 'politicians' spending YOUR tax money. A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of it's releases.
A. A billion seconds ago it was 1959.
B. A billion minutes ago Jesus was alive.
C. A billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age.
D. A billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet.
E. A billion dollars ago was only 8 hours and 20 min., at the rate our government is spending it.

While this thought is still fresh in our brain... let's take a look at New Orleans .. It's amazing what you can learn with some simple division. Louisiana Senator,Mary Landrieu (D) is presently asking Congress for 250 BILLION DOLLARS to rebuild New Orleans . Interesting number.... what does it mean?
A. Well... if you are one of the 484,674 residents of NewOrleans (every man, woman, and child) you each get $516,528.
B. Or... if you have one of the 188,251 homes in New Orleans , your home gets $1,329,787.
C. Or... if you are a family of four... your family gets $2,066,012.
HELLO! Washington, D.C. Are all your calculators broken??

The Blind Leading The Blind!

2008-12-04T06:52:00.003-05:00

They're back! The auto executives are back begging for money from our congressmen that can't balance a checkbook themselves! If this isn't the blind leading the blind.....then my name isn't Meats! Our great leaders can't track the money they gave out already, and they're going to probably say "no" to a loan to the auto makers......a loan! The plants and equipment owned by the automakers would be more than enough to secure a 33 billion loan. The Wall street crooks just got handed billions, and they don't want to "loan" money to keep the big 3 afloat! Is this a nightmare or what? This is like having the insane running the asylum or should I say like having the inmates running the prison? I think since the congress "fixed" the credit crisis (supposedly) why not have the big three borrow from the banks that are in the process of getting 700 billion dollars from our great leaders in Washington! Maybe if the government had split the 700 billion dollars amoungst all the "Paying" taxpayers of this country, we the taxpayer would have paid off our loans, credit cards and mortgages and all the banks would have gotten the money anyways! The credit crisis would have been fixed and we the taxpayer would have been able to start with a clean slate. Well, that's enough for now....hopefully our new President and his cabinet will lead our great nation in the right direction and get us out of this mess in a few years. Meats

Thanksgiving Update!

2008-12-03T07:20:00.003-05:00

Well Dane....you asked for it.....an update of our Thanksgiving! It was pure joy to have my whole family to our house for 34 lbs. of organic turkey with all the fixin's!! Nineteen adults and two granddaughters put a good dent into the food on thursday not to mention all the margaritas, wine and mixed drinks consumed! Fifteen for breakfast the next morning before they all left was also fun. It was about time for us to host all of my family! I'll attach a few pictures for all to see. If I left anything out Dane, let me know and I'll add it! Next will be Christmas!!! Happy Holidays To All My Avid Readers, Friends And Family!! Meats

Attract or Repel Wildlife?

2008-11-20T07:22:00.002-05:00

Wild One has left a new comment on your post "A Women of few words!":
Meats,
love the piggy cake... love the pink!!
I have a question... do you think it is better to repel or attract wildlife to your yard?
Thanks!

Dear Wild One,
The piggy cake tasted as good as it looked! As far as attracting or repelling wildlife, that would depend on where you live.....The Everglades, Africa or Pittsburgh!! If it's Pittsburgh, it's OK as long as they (the deer) don't start eating all your shrubs and flowers when you decide to stop feeding them. They will enjoy the food for sure...but may become dependent on it during the winter. Let me know what kinds of animals you attract! Thanks for the question,,,,keep them coming! Meats

A Women of few words!

2008-11-11T20:25:00.003-05:00

Vallerie has left a new comment on your post "Iron City Beer.......":

Good words.

Dear Vallerie,

You certainly are a women of few words.......I know you're not my wife because you have two l's in your name! Thanks for reading my blog and the response.....my blog has not had a lot of activity lately! Tell all your friends about "askmeats" and maybe I'll get busy again!!

Meats

Tomorrow is E-Day (Election day!)

2008-11-03T20:58:00.002-05:00

Well, tomorrow is E-Day! We'll have voted a new President into office tomorrow, and I'll be really glad when this is all over with. I've never seen such division between the Democrats and Republicans in my life! I really don't think it will make a whole hill of beans difference who gets elected...it's the congress that really runs the show in this country, them and their "pork". I think that you must vote for who will do the best job for your situation in life at this particular moment. If the country keeps going the way it is with the economy in the crapper, government programs will be necessary to sustain the vast majority of Americans. If you are independently wealthy and your portfolio is 30% less than last year and you don't want to contribute a little more to help the national debt, then you know who to vote for. If you want the fair tax, then you can waste a vote for that candidate. But no matter who you vote for, just remember....this is America, and when someone says "share the wealth" I don't think that they mean give everything to the poor, but rather cut them a little tax break. If you make a million dollars a year, what will an extra $50,000 or so in taxes do to hinder your lifestyle? Probably nothing but not let you trade in your Mercedes for another year! A balance between government programs to help the truely desperate, and helping freeloaders, must be maintained. I think that if we try to help us as Americans first, before sending all the taxpayers money for aid to other countries, certainly would help our situation at home! Well, enough of my rambling....get out and vote. Remember, we don't have to fear anything when voting (unlike some other countries!)....just get out and vote! God has blessed America....don't forget it! Meats

Something to think about!!

2008-10-20T07:39:00.001-04:00

Something to think about.
Rick Warren (REMEMBER HE WROTE 'PURPOSE DRIVEN LIFE')
You will enjoy the new insights that Rick Warren has, with his wife now having cancer and him having 'wealth' from the book sales. This is an absolutely incredible short interview with Rick Warren,

'Purpose Dri ven Life ' author and pastor of Saddleback Church in California

In the interview by Paul Bradshaw with Rick Warren, Rick said:

People ask me, What is the purpose of life? And I respond: In a nutshell, life is preparation for eternity. We were not made to last forever, and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven.

One day my heart is going to stop, and that will be the end of my body-- but not the end of me.

I may live 60 to 100 years on earth, but I am going to spend trillions of years in eternity. This is the warm-up act - the dress rehearsal. God wants us to practice on earth what we will do forever in eternity.

We were made by God and for God, and until you figure that out, life isn't going to make sense.

Life is a series of problems: Either you are in one now, you're just coming out of one, or you're getting ready to go into another one.

The reason for this is that God is more interested in your character than your comfort.

God is more interested in making your life holy than He is in making your life happy.

We can be reasonably happy here on earth, but that's not the goal of life. The goal is to grow in character, in Christ likeness.

This past year has been the greatest year of my life but also the toughest, with my wife, Kay, getting cancer.

I used to think that life was hills and valleys - you go through a dark time, then you go to the mountaintop, back and forth. I don't believe that anymore.

Rather than life being hills and valleys, I believe that it's kind of like two rails on a railroad track, and at all times you have something good and something bad in your life.

No matter how good things are in your life, there is always something bad that needs to be worked on.

And no matter how bad things are in your life, there is always something good you can thank God for.

You can focus on your purposes, or you can focus on your problems.

If y ou focus on your problems, you're going into self-centeredness,'which is my problem, my issues, my pain.' But one of the easiest ways to get rid of pain is to get your focus off yourself and onto God and others.

We discovered quickly that in spite of the prayers of hundreds of thousands of people, God was not going to heal Kay or make it easy for her.

It has been very difficult for her, and yet God has strengthened her character, given her a ministry of helping other people, given her a testimony, drawn her closer to Him and to people.

You have to learn to deal with both the good and the bad of life.

Actually, sometimes learning to deal with the good is harder. For instance, this past year, all of a sudden, when the book sold 15 million copies, it made me instantly very wealthy.

It also brought a lot of notoriety that I had never had to deal with before. I don't think God gives you money or notoriety for your own ego or for you to live a life of e ase.

So I began to ask God what He wanted me to do with this money, notoriety and influence. He gave me two different passages that helped me decide what to do, II Corinthians 9 and Psalm 72

First, in spite of all the money coming in, we would not change our lifestyle one bit. We made no major purchases.
Second, about midway through last year, I stopped taking a salary from the church.

Third, we set up foundations to fund an initiative we call The Peace Plan to plant churches, equip leaders, assist the poor, care for the sick, and educate the next generation.

Fourth, I added up all that the chu rch had paid me in the 24 years since I started the church, and I gave it all back. It was liberating to be able to serve God for free.

We need to ask ourselves: Am I going to live for possessions? Popularity?

Am I going to be driven by pressures? Guilt? Bitterness? Materialism? Or am I going to be driven by God's purposes (for my life)?

Wh en I get up in the morning, I sit on the side of my bed and say, God, if I don't get anything else done today, I want to know You more and love You better. God didn't put me on earth just to fulfill a to-do list. He's more interested in what I am than what I do.
That's why we're called human beings, not human doings.

Happy moments, PRAISE GOD.
Difficult moments, SEEK GOD.
Quiet moments, WORSHIP GOD.
Painful moments, TRUST GOD.
Every moment, THANK GOD.
God's Blessings on you today.

David Letterman's Take On America!!

2008-10-17T07:23:00.002-04:00

David Letterman wrote this;
'The other day I was reading Newsweek magazine and came across some Poll data I found rather hard to believe. It must be true given the source, right? The Newsweek poll alleges that 67 percent of Americans are unhappy with the direction the country is headed and 69 percent of the country is unhappy with the performance of the President. In essence 2/3 of the citizenry just ain't happy and want a change. So being the knuckle dragger I am, I started thinking, 'What are we so unhappy about?' (A) Is it that we have electricity and running water 24 hours a day, 7 Days a week? (B) Is our unhappiness the result of having air conditioning in the summer and heating in the winter? (C) Could it be that 95.4 percent of these unhappy folks have a job? (D) Maybe it is the ability to walk into a grocery store at any time and see more food in moments than Darfur has seen in the last year? (E) Maybe it is the ability to drive our cars and trucks from the Pacific Ocean to the Atlantic Ocean without having to present identification papers as we move through each state. (F) Or possibly the hundreds of clean and safe motels we would find along the way that can provide temporary shelter? (G) I guess having thousands of restaurants with varying cuisine from around the world is just not good enough either. (H) Or could it be that when we wreck our car, emergency workers show up and provide services to help all and even send a helicopter to take you to the hospital. (I)Perhaps you are one of the 70 percent of Americans who own a home. (J) You may be upset with knowing that in the unfortunate case of a fire, a group of trained firefighters will appear in moments and use top notch equipment to extinguish the flames thus saving you, your family, and your belongings. (K) Or if, while at home watching one of your many flat screen TVs, a burglar or prowler intrudes, an officer equipped with a gun and a bullet-proof vest will come to defend you and your family against attack or loss. (L) This all in the backdrop of a neighborhood free of bombs or militias raping and pillaging the residents. Neighborhoods where 90% of teenagers own cell phones and computers. (M) How about the complete religious, social and political freedoms we enjoy that are the envy of everyone in the world? Maybe that is what has 67% of you folks unhappy. Fact is, we are the largest group of ungrateful, spoiled brats the world has ever seen. No wonder the world loves the U.S. , yet has a great disdain for its citizens. They see us for what we are. The most blessed people in the world who do nothing but complain about what we don't have, and what we hate about the country instead of thanking the good Lord we live here.I know, I know. What about the president who took us into war and has no plan to get us out? The president who has a measly 31 percent approval rating? Is this the same president who guided the nation in the dark days after 9/11? The president that cut taxes to bring an economy out of recession? Could this be the same guy who has been called every name in the book for succeeding in keeping all the spoiled ungrateful brats safe from terrorist attacks? The commander in chief of an all-volunteer army that is out there defending you and me?
Did you hear how bad the President is on the news or talk show? Did this news affect you so much, make you so unhappy you couldn't take a look around for yourself and see all the good things and be glad? Think about it.......are you upset at the President because he actually caused you personal pain OR is it because the 'Media' told you he was failing to kiss your sorry ungrateful behind every day.
Make no mistake about it. The troops in Iraq and Afghanistan have volunteered to serve, and in many cases may have died for your freedom. There is currently no draft in this country. They didn't have to go. They are able to refuse to go and end up with either a ''general'' discharge, an 'other than honorable'' discharge or, worst case scenario, a ''dishonorable' discharge after a few days inthe brig.So why then the flat-out discontentment in the minds of 69 percent of Americans?Say what you want, but I blame it on the media. If it bleeds it leads and they specialize in bad news. Everybody will watch a car crash with blood and guts. How many will watch kids selling lemonade at the corner? The media knows this and media outlets are for-profit corporations. They offer what sells, and when criticized, try to defend their actions by 'justifying' them in one way or another. Just ask why they tried to allow a murderer like O.J.. Simpson to write a book about how he didn't kill his wife, but if he did he would have done itthis way......Insane! Turn off the TV, burn Newsweek, and use the NewYork Times for the bottom of your bird cage. Then start being grateful for all we have as a country. There is exponentially more good than bad. We are among the most blessed people on Earth and should thank God several times a day, or at least be thankful and appreciative.' 'With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another, and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks, 'Are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?'

-David Letterman

Who Would Want The Job?

2008-09-23T07:26:00.003-04:00

Well, it is coming down to the wire.....Obama or McCain. Who is it going to be? Who would want the job in the first place? The economy is in the crapper, the price of oil is up..again..we the American taxpayer are going to own alot of ready-to-be-foreclosed on properties across the land (700 Billion bailout), everyone's 401K's and retirement accounts are dropping like rocks....what a mess!! How will it all end? Is this the end of our Country as we knew it? Do we need more Government control or better people in control? Personally I don't think either Obama or McCain can really make much of a difference...it has to come from Congress. They have to work together to get our spending under control, and start doing the right things for all of America, not just their states. Every member of Congress should remember that we are the "United States of America", not the "Red and Blue States of America", and be working for the common good of all the people of this country, not just for themselves and their political party. Well, enough rambling......give me your feedback. Meats

Jade says "Sorry Buddy"

2008-09-16T06:59:00.002-04:00

Jade has left a new comment on your post "Jade needs to get out more!!!":
Anonymous,
Wow! I must have really offended you! You sound pretty upset at me! Sorry, buddy, whoever you are. You are right about one thing: I do need to get out more. So would you do me a favor and ask my Meats to babysit for me more? j/k.. He's with my daughters all the time.
The only thing that confused me about your post is what you were really trying to say. So, do you think the government ought to be doing more to help end poverty? (It seems like you don't think so) OR that individuals and others, like churches, ought to be doing more (you didn't sound like you liked that idea either?) Well-- I actually have been to a third world country. Yes, it is heart-wrenching. So, I have seen the difference between American poverty and third-world poverty. What can we do about it? I don't know for certain, but I seriously think about these things all the time and am trying to grow in caring more about social justice issues. Meats-- can you help out? Get me out more and come up with a solution for poverty around the world, k? You can handle that, right? Love, jade

Dear Jade,
I guess I've failed as a father...you've not been out enough....I've protected you too much!! Lets' recap your life.....mission trip to Trinidad at 16 years old, to college at 17, married at 19, finished up college with your husband at 20, worked for a Church, bought a house at 21, back for your masters and received that at 24 (while working for Wheaton College), a trip to Australia, first baby at 25, second baby at 26, and you just turned 27 on September 14, 2008, while your husband is spending his week in Med school in Philadelphia!! Well Mr. or Ms. Anonomyous....put that in your pipe and smoke it!! Can you top what my daughter and son-in-law have done? Let me know, because I don't like people picking on my "little girl" and son-in-law!!! And yes Jade, I will babysit more so you can continue getting out more often!! Love Dad (Meats)

Jade needs to get out more!!!

2008-09-14T20:21:00.004-04:00

Jade,
You need to get out more.
There are food banks with free food for those in need, clothes banks that do the same thing. Shelters for people to stay and work groups to help people find work.
Many of them are not goverment affiliated and THAT is the problem.
Liberals and democrats are not interested in helping people. They want those people dependant on THEM and their goverment. So they push to get the goverment to do everything for them. They want to FORCE you to help others, even though you may be doing it on your own anyway.
Here's the difference, in 1994 a man took a picture of a little girl struggling to make it to the UN food center. She was crawling along the ground when a vulture landed and stood there waiting for her to die.
The photographer waited for 20 minutes hoping the vulture would spread it's wings but it never did. He finally took the picture and scared off the vulture.
Since it was hot, he went and sat under a tree to smoke a cigarette and continued to watch that little girl struggle to make it to the UN center.
He then takes the picture and wins a Nobel Peace prize to show why goverments need to take action.
He committed suicide 3 months later after realizing all he had to do was pick up that little girl and get her some food.
That's the difference in a liberal and a conservative. The conservative does it themselves out of true caring. The liberal uses your desire to help as a way to push their ideals onto others and make them dependent on their government.
And by the way, just spend a few days in a real poverty stricken nation and you'll be feeling bad you thought poverty in America meant not being able to own a laptop.

Dear Anonoymous,
Is that true about the photographer? But, I do agree that the Dems do try to do it all so the people become dependent on the government, but a happy medium would be nice!! Take care of those truely in need, not the couch potatoes, crack dealers and lazy asses!! Thanks for the comment! (Easy on my daughter!!) Meats

This Guy is Wearing Me Out!!

2008-09-07T10:35:00.002-04:00

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "You Must Feel It !!!":
Meats,
I guess I don't know what I'm looking for, but what bugs me about this guy is his lack of maturity and stability. He's still going through a divorce, he lives with his mom, and he talks a lot. I mean, A LOT. He'll tell the story three different ways just to keep talking. I joke with him about it, but it doesn't help. Most of his stories about his past have a sentence somewhere in them stating, "I was so wasted." I know he's not like that now, but it's like he was proud he spent his youth wasted. He demands a lot of my attention, yet I'm expected to be the one who supervises and disciplines the kids when we're all together. It is like he is one of the kids sometimes. I make more money than him, so I end up paying for a lot of our outings. I don't care about the money, but it would be nice if I heard a "thank you."
I guess I just don't see how this is all benefitting me, especially if I'm not head over heals. It's a lot of work with little payoff.
Anyway, he is a nice, loyal, funny guy. It's just not enough. And I'm not sure exactly what it is I'd ask for if I tried to talk to him about it.
Thanks for listening to the vent. :)

Dear Anonymous,

This guy is wearing me out!! He sounds like he wants a "Mother figure" to hook up with......someone to feed him, board him and listen to him.....and, on top of it all, take care of his kids!! I don't think that this relationship will work out for you unless he undergoes major therapy!! It sounds like he has come to expect everything to be done for him. That kind of attitude can be dangerous if you marry him. You'll get everything dumped on you then!! I think that if you can "just be friends" with this guy you'd be better off. You need someone that wants to have a life with you and your kids, appreciates what you "bring to the table" in the way of money, discipline, stability and maturity. Tell him you don't want to look back on your life and have to tell the next person you date that you "wasted" a lot of time with him!! Keep me informed as to the outcome.........Good luck! Meats

More "Banter".....

2008-08-30T10:16:00.003-04:00

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Political Fun Again!!":
Jade,
Your argument has shifted from what we initially began discussing. In no way do I think "charity" is a bad thing. Charity is a great thing and honestly the world needs more of it. What I am discussing however is not the homeless man on the streets (most of which are drug addicts or mental). I am discussing those living on government assistance, have a roof over their heads, clothes on their backs, yet choose to turn their backs on an education they could easily acquire.
The MASS majority of poor (below the poverty line, not necessarily homeless, there is a difference) have every opportunity to get themsleves out of poverty, but you cannot force someone to carry pride in what they do. Most government assistance teaches laziness. Government assitance should be provided to the individuals striving to become better; be it a mcdonalds job, obtaining a GED, or simply volunteering in the community.
The people in my old apartment community I am was speaking about before did not in fact NEED to steal car stereos. Their housing was paid for, they were in all likelihood receiving some type of food stamps, and attending a public school (Howard county has the best public schools in Maryland by the way). These individuals have every opportunity in front of them to be better and create a better life for the next generation. However since they watched their mother sit around all day, not work, and collect government checks how can they ever learn hard work.
Government assistance is an absolute necessity, however you cannot simply decide that ALL people in a certain income deserve to have their housing/food/health insurance paid for by others. It does need to come with certain qualifiers; certain benchmarks to show an honest effort at improving your own life and those around you. That is what I mean when I say teach a man to fish. Children learn by observation, not a lack of money.
If you are brave enough I dare you to try and teach any high school class in inner Baltimore. You don't even need a teaching degree, they will simply take a willing body.
I am not saying not to the help the poor, I am saying that what we have now is broken and needs to be reevaluated.
PS-I give the countless homeless in DC a dollar when I can spare it as well as a cigarette. My heart goes out to them, because Lord knows what they have been through. The 15 year old hood-rat that lives in a high end community paid for by my federal tax dollars receives no sympathy for stealing stereos. While I understand your compassion, Dane has never had to worry while he was away. I worried every time I left Becky alone for a business trip.

Dear Anonoymous (James)....great thoughts! I wish everyone would read this blog, it may help a few people to understand what is happening in our country today!! Meats

Political Fun Again!!

2008-08-29T06:56:00.003-04:00

Jade has left a new comment on your post "More Political Fun!!":
Dad,
It's too bad that the liberal democrat in your cute example wouldn't want a homeless person in their yard working. Would you? I don't see a lot of rich people offering jobs to the homeless people of downtown Pittsburgh? Say you were looking to hire someone as your assistant-- would you hire someone who had no teeth and smelled and didn't speak really great English. I disagree that it's so easy in this country to just pull yourself up by your boot straps and live the American dream. Sorry. I do think that church should be more of the answer than the government. I think churches ought to be doing more to help the poor because that is one of the things God calls us to do to follow Him. So, I'm still figuring out if I'm democrat or republican (probably more republican), BUT, I just cannot stand when people stereotype the "poor" and act like all that they need to do is try harder. We need to help each other! That's my main point-- WE need to know homeless people and help each other out. I'm not saying the government should force people to do that, but I'm just saying we all should do our part. jade :)

Dear Jade,

In the example, it was a little girl that was going to work in someone's yard and give her hard earned money to the homeless guy.......but, the little girl wanted the homeless guy to work for his own money! Now I agree that there are not too many homeless people doing yard work around, here, but lets agree on one thing....some of the homeless have mental problems and others just choose to live that way, because they are down on their luck, and have no family to turn to. As far as churches go, you are right.....there are hundreds of them around cities and they should be taking care of the homeless and poor. The government should not have to make people care for each other, rather we should want to care for each other!! What has happened to our society? How did we ever survive the 1700's and 1800's without healthcare, unemployment and all the other government subsistance that is provided today........we worked hard and took care of each other! The people of today have lost that and it's all about "me" and what "we" can get for ourselves. If our society doesn't get back to helping each other without it being mandated by the government, then we will have to change to a socialistic government that then equals out the playing field by high taxes on the rich and giving to the poor.....but there is really no other way unless we get off our butts, join up with churches or other organizations and help each other out in our country and in our local communities!!
As far as hiring a person that couldn't speak great English, or had no teeth....I could care less...I had a young guy working for me years ago with no teeth.....we offered to pay for him to get them fixed, but he was too proud and got them taken care of on his own! As far as smelling, a bath could take care of that problem....no excuse for stink!! Communicating with persons from other countries is a challange, and one that I enjoy. I wish I could speak another language, but I never learned! If I did go to another country though, I'd surely try to learn their language!!
Thanks for the comment!!
Sorry....I was long winded too!! Meats

More Political Fun!!

2008-08-28T07:13:00.002-04:00

Subject: Political Humor

I was talking to a friend of mine's little girl the other day. I asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up and she replied, "I want to be President!" Both of her parents are liberal Democrats and were standing there. So then I asked her, "If you were President what would be the first thing you would do?" She replied, "I'd give houses to all the homeless people." "Wow, what a worthy goal." I told her, "You don't have to wait until you're President to do that. You can come over to my house and mow, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you $50. Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where this homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the $50 to use toward a new house." Since she is only 6, she thought that over for a few seconds. While her Mom glared at me, the little girl looked me straight in the eye and asked, "Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and do the work, and you can just pay him the $50?" And I said, "Welcome to the Republican Party." Her folks still aren't talking to me.

Sorry.....I couldn't resist posting this!! Surprisingly, I got this in an e-mail from an old friend of mine who is a staunch Democrat!!! Meats

How do we help the poor?

2008-08-27T06:58:00.002-04:00

Jade has left a new comment on your post "Learn To Fish......Take Care Of The Poor?":
James,
I disagree with many of the comments you made, but don't have time to do the full out rebuttal essay that I'd like to. Let me just say this: there will always be poor people. I'm sorry about the people near where you live that are breaking into cars and such. I'm sure a lot of them aren't doing it just for fun-- they really do need the money. And yes, there are people who have irresponsible smoking habits, but so many poor people just don't know how to do life differently. They may not know they CAN go to college, they may not realize how to even work hard, or that stealing and drugs are really not okay. People need to teach them and show them the way. The question is: what can each of us do to "help" the poor? People cannot always just help themselves. People need good parents, friends, and schools to help guide them. So, if they don't have those resources, we need to somehow try to get to know poor people so we can befriend them and help them along their way. jade :)

Dear Jade,
I know you didn't direct this comment to me, but I just want to say that I agree that we need to show, guide and do whatever we can to help the poor......but don't start another government agency to "help" the poor......the ones in place now barely work! Answer me this question....how come some of the poorest people can pull themselves out of the depths of poverty and become productive citizens of this country while others don't or can't? It's not always how and where you were raised, but more importantly.......your pride, dignity and determination, from within yourself, to succeed......you can't teach that, but you can lead by example. In this great country of ours anybody, no matter their situation, can make something of themself. It's up to each and every one of us to help others when we can, and lead by example!! Meats

Learn To Fish......Take Care Of The Poor?

2008-08-25T07:45:00.003-04:00

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Here is your answer!!":
Give a man a fish and he'll be hungry in a day. Teach a man to fish and he will be fat forever.
Jade,
Here is my problem with your argument. Most of those that receive government assitance have every opportunity to attend a decent college or get out of poverty. Most colleges provide enough financing, scholarships, and aid that someone of poverty can attend college cheaper than someone of a lower-middle class household.
I myslef came out of college with $25,000 in student loans. Harvard, for example, allows FREE tuition and board if your family makes less than $60,000 per year...FREE.
Where I hold my major disagreement with your argument is that FREE assistance does not teach the "have-nots" how to get out of poverty. The last apartment I lived in accepted section 8 housing. While we paid $1400 per month the section 8 tenants had their rent paid for in full by the government. We lived in a high end community that had car break-ins, apartment break-ins, and lots of other petty crimes.
Is it fair that 40% of my income is taken every paycheck so that it can pay for people to live in a beautful community only so that they can have nicer cars to break in to?
Secondly, when Dane becomes a doctor we will encounter many people on government assistance. These people will walk in with a 2 pack-per-day smoking habit, 5 children, and no job but be unable to pay for their medical perscription (which will be a fraction of what everyone else pays).
Is it fair that someone like that gets every thing handed to them, while Joe the self-employed plumber can't afford a health care policy to cover his wife and kids?
In our country today the poverty stricken have every opportunity to get out of poverty. The harder jump to make is that of lower-middle class to middle class. The working man gets squeezed while the poor rely on free government assistance.
Take a stroll through West Baltimore and let me know if government assistance is working. one of the highest murder rates in the country and also most liberal with government assistance.
Coincidence?
You make the call.

Dear Anonomyous,
I'm glad you directed that one to Jade!! Thanks for the comment......Meats

You Must Feel It !!!

2008-08-25T07:19:00.002-04:00

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post:
Meats, I have a problem. I have been dating a guy for a year, and I just haven't been feeling it for him. He's sweet, nice, fun, polite... but I don't see me spending the rest of my life with him. And I don't see myself growing into love with him. He puts me on a pedastal. We have kids between us and our kids have grown very close. I don't want to stop dating him, but I feel extremely guilty about my lack of matching feelings for him. What do you think should happen here, if anything?

Dear Anonymous,
If you truely don't have the feeling that you can't live without him, you better wind down the relationship. You didn't say how old your kids were and his kids, but I wouldn't worry too much about them, they can choose to be friends when they grow up if you two are married or not! The real question is if he is so sweet, nice, fun, polite and puts you on a pedastal, what are you looking for in a guy? Nasty, rude, mean boring guys don't make for very good husbands!! Don't forget that the grass always looks greener on the other side until you get there! I'd think long and hard before you completely end the relationship. Maybe try talking about seeing other people and tell him that you want to be sure that he is the one. If you let something go and it comes back, then it was meant to be from the start. If he is truely in love with you, then he will want you to be happy and will grant you your wish, knowing that you will come back with a better appreciation for him. Now, granted this does not always work, but in your situation, with you feeling the way you do, it may be worth a shot!! And besides that, it's a win-win situation for you! Good luck and let me know what happens. Meats

Here is your answer!!

2008-08-19T07:13:00.003-04:00

Jade has left a new comment on your post "Difference between Democrats & Republicans!!":
Dad,
The idea of comparing GPA's to redistributing wealth fails on many accounts. First of all, people who have need for welfare or other forms of "redistributing wealth" are not "playing around" while others work hard. There are many who are working extremely hard (for example-- migrant workers) who are not offered a livable wage. I would recommend the book "The Working Poor" to you and suggest that there are indeed many people working extremely hard who cannot get out of poverty. It is much easier for those of us, such as myself, who come from families that have money and resources to help me get on my feet. You were able to send me to a good college and help me in so many aspects. But picture all of the people out there who are as smart as me, but don't have the parents who encourage them to go to college, who have the resources to buy them books to study for the SAT, who can't afford a computer, who can't even help their kids with money for college or after college to get started. There ought to be programs and scholarships available for such people to help them.I guess, what I'm saying is, that not everybody who merely determines to "work hard" will necessarily make it out of poverty. They need an education, they need opportunities (think of all of the people you know who help others get jobs..ahem..your job for example). Do you realize that many people in poverty do not "know people" to help them get jobs? Anyway-- I feel there ought to be programs in place to help people get on their feet! To help them when they temporarily need support. To help them get health insurance when they need it. Would you rather these people not go into a hospital when they need help?? There are too many people in our very own country who "work hard" but still do not have enough food in their cupboards or will not got to the doctor when they are sick. Yes-- I am willing to give away some of my income (not that I have any yet...) to help them. Sorry if I seem so impassioned about this.Love, Your daughter :)

Dear Jade,

It was an e-mail....I didn't say I agreed with it!! Of course we need the government to help its people, whether they are down on their luck, grew up poor, lost a job, going to school, kids of single parents....etc. etc. I also agree that some people don't "know" people that can help open doors to obtain a job. But don't forget that both your mother and father always worked to give you and your brother everything you wanted! Your mother cleaned dorm rooms and filthy bathrooms, has racked her body cutting hair for 33 years and I worked 60 hours a week at my own business, could have collected unemployment...but refused, and worked out of town for two years to provide for our family! (Because our kids/kid didn't want to move!!) Don't forget that you did not want your mother to be a "lunch lady"!! We were willing to take on any and all jobs to provide for our family. NEVER LOSE SIGHT OF THAT!! In any society you MUST help those that can't always help themselves. BUT.....if it becomes a way of life and people give up trying....you have enabled people to not have to do better. I think that our government, spending billions of dollars fighting a war in Iraq and Afganistan, could better put that money to use in this country by sureing up our borders, helping the young people of this country get a good education and make sure everyone has healthcare that can't afford it on their own, or is not covered through their job. Freedom is the key word for this country....you have religious freedom, freedom to move about the country, freedom to open your own business and live the American Dream. There is nothing I want more than you, Dane and my grandchildren to live the American Dream. When you need help, the government or your parents will be there for you.....through programs for people in your situation when going to med school or your parents when your husband is gone all week. Who really knows the answer....your mom and I just try to do the right things all the time, but we are human and therefore flawed!! All we can do is show our love & support for both our kids, their families and pray for continued blessings! Thanks for the comment.....its good to have these deep conversations in public!!??? Meats (Dad)

Difference between Democrats & Republicans!!

2008-08-15T21:14:00.003-04:00

I don't know who wrote this, but I received it in an e-mail, and had to share it with all you bloggers out there!! Meats

The Father & Daughter Talk :
A young woman was about to finish her first year of college. Like so many others her age, she considered herself to be a very liberal Democrat, and among other liberal ideals, was very much in favor of higher taxes to support more government programs, in other words redistribution of wealth. She was deeply ashamed that her father was a rather staunch Republican, a feeling she openly expressed. Based on the lectures that she had participated in, and the occasional chat with a professor, she felt that her father had for years harbored an evil, selfish desire to keep what he thought should be his. One day she was challenging her father on his opposition to higher taxes on the rich and the need for more government programs. The self-professed objectivity proclaimed by her professors had to be the truth and she indicated so to her father. He responded by asking how she was doing in school. Taken aback, she answered rather haughtily that she had a 4.0 GPA, and let him know that it was tough to maintain, insisting that she was taking a very difficult course load and was constantly studying, which left her no time to go out and party like other people she knew. She didn't even have time for a boyfriend, and didn't really have many college friends because she spent all her time studying. Her father listened and then asked, 'How is your friend Audrey doing?' She replied, 'Audrey is barely getting by. All she takes are easy classes, she never studies, and she barely has a 2.0 GPA. She is so popular on campus; college for her is a blast. She's always invited to all the parties and lots of times she doesn't even show up for classes because she's too hung over! Her wise father asked his daughter, 'Why don't you go to the Dean's office and ask him to deduct 1.0 off your GPA and give it to your friend who only has a 2.0. That way you will both have a 3.0 GPA and certainly that would be a fair and equal distribution of GPA.' The daughter, visibly shocked by her father's suggestion, angrily fired back, 'That's a crazy idea, and how would that be fair! I've worked really hard for my grades! I've invested a lot of time, and a lot of hard work! Audrey has done next to nothing toward her degree. She played while I worked my tail off!' The father slowly smiled, winked and said gently, 'Welcome to the Republican party.'
If anyone has a better explanation of the difference between Republican and Democrat I'm all ears.

Frozen Food on Airplanes?

2008-08-15T08:29:00.003-04:00

Hi Meats,Dawn here. Do you know if a person (specifically, Dane) can bring frozen foods on an airplane in a carry-on piece of luggage? Or, do you think he should check his frozen meals? How long will they remain in a frozen state?Thanks.Dawn

Dear Dawn,
I checked the TSA and FAA websites and you get the same run-a-round.....I copied what it said below. I doubt very much if they will let him on with anything that is over 3.5 oz. frozen. Their argument will be that there is over 3.5 oz. of liquid in each of the frozen containers, and they are not in clear little plastic bags! The other concern is a possible flight delay. That would allow the frozen food to thaw after a few hours unless it was packed in dry ice. It seems to me that it won't be worth the hassle to try to get the frozen food back to Philly. Just have Dane eat well while home, and buy frozen dinners, fast food or cook at his apartment when there! Thanks for the question.......I'll eat the food he can't take back with him!!!! Meats

TSA: What To Know Before You Go... Frozen gels/liquids for any other purpose are not permitted. ... This information is summarized at www.faa.gov. Back To Top. Food & Drinks. Item, Carry-on, Checked. ... www.tsa.gov/travelers/airtravel/prohibited/permitted-prohibited-items.shtm - 44k

Business 101......

2008-08-14T06:59:00.002-04:00

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Gas Prices at Get Gos......":
Meats, good thinking, on the surface. But the pricier GetGo isn't exactly hearing my message if I'm not voicing it. I think they charge more BECAUSE others are going to the nearby station, and they need to make up for the difference in sales. I think I am late in discovering this, as the pricier GetGo normally has adequate traffic but the cheaper one (in a more affluent community) has cars lined up. Are GetGos franchises? Bad biz decisions could be to blame in that case. On the other hand, I think we can all breathe a sigh of relief that prices are finally dropping. What kind of car do you drive?

Dear Anonymous,
In an economy, that is free to charge whatever the market will bear, charging higher prices, because the other gas stations are charging less, does not make good business sense. If for instance, you were in business selling beer.....another beer distributor opens up across the street from you and sells the same case of beer for $1.00 less....you may lose customers. The smart businessman would do one of two things. Lower the price of his case of beer to match the competition (so as not to lose customers) or provide the best service to his customers and offer other discounts such as frequent buyer cards, or free give aways of merchandise that would be provided by his suppliers. To think that in a free market society you can charge higher prices because you are losing customers to your competition's lower prices, you will not only lose all your customers, but you will be bankrupt in a very short period of time! Now, the real reason GetGo can charge a little higher price at the pump is because just about everyone is redeaming their rewards from Giant Eagle purchases ($.10 gas credit, per gallon, for every $50.00 spent at the store). So this means most people don't care if the price is a little higher, they are receiving up to 30 gallons of gas at a reduced rate of anywhere from $.10 off per gallon, to free gas!! I hope that explains the situation better for you!! Yes, we can be thankful the price of gas is dropping a little. I said a month or so ago that the price would level off at around $3.50 to $3.75 per gallon. The cars I drive are a Ford Taurus and a Toyota Sienna. Thanks for the question and comment! Meats

2008-07-22T07:26:00.003-04:00

Good Morning All,
It's been awhile since I posted anything, so here goes......life is good, had a few days of vacation at the beach with our friends...lots of sun, drinks, food and laughs! Grand-kids are going to be coming back from the Twin Cities on Wednesday, and then we are going to Baltimore to see our son's new house on Friday.
Now....question for all you bloggers out there....(1) Is Obama going to win? (2) Will McCain stop being so boring? (3) Will we ever see $2.50 per gallon of gas again? (4) Will my house be able to sell for what I paid for it? (5) When is Moon Township going to realize that you can't keep raising taxes without people wanting to move out of here!!! (6) Is the news media biased towards Obama? (7) Where do you want to retire? (8) At what age do you think you would want to retire? (9) Will Hillary ever be our President in the future? (10) Will Dane ever fix the slow leak in his right front tire??? Now, there is some food for thought!! How about some responses!!! Meats

Gas Prices at Get Gos......

2008-07-15T19:45:00.003-04:00

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Wedding and Fuel Problems!!!":
Meats, I have two GetGos near my house. One is very convenient, on my routes, so I've been going there for $4.09. The other day I drove past the other one, and it was $3.99. I thought, WOW, price is going down! Drove past the regular one today and it was still $4.09. I realized they are just.... charging different prices for the same gas. How can gas stations within a mile of each other be 10 cents different???

Dear Anonymous,
It seems that gas stations are getting what they can, or what the market will bear, for fuel prices. Just go to the cheapest station for gas and you will send a message to the other stations. I hope that in the near future the gas price will level off at $3.50 to $3.75. It looks like the price for a barrell of oil is slowly coming down. The futures traders are going to get burned......that will teach them to gamble against us!! Thanks for the question. Meats

Back To Reality.....

2008-06-28T08:10:00.002-04:00

Back to reality....James & Becky have been married a week today. They are coming back from their honeymoon today.....everything went too fast!!
Now, back to the election....did Obama lose his credibility by bowing down to Hillary yesterday? Do you really think he likes her? They really had some heated exchanges over the past months....are they really going to put their differences aside? I think he agreed to help pay off her campaign debt just to "buy" her supporters. Will they see through this? Feedback please! Meats

Glad To Celebrate!!

2008-06-27T06:43:00.003-04:00

Great wedding....great pictures. How does it feel to have both kids married and happy. We were so glad to be able to help you celebrate. P & A

Dear P & A,
It is a great feeling knowing that both of your kids are grown and married to wonderful spouses.....but, it makes me feel old! We were so glad that you and A were able to come up and celebrate with us....and it was good to see you both again. In a few days we'll see you at the beach!! Get you liver ready for the high dose of alcohol!! Meats

James &Becky Finally Married!!

2008-06-24T20:01:00.002-04:00

James & Becky are finally married!!! The wedding was great......all our family and friends celebrated with us , and hopefully had as good a time as we did!! It was fantastic to party with all our family members and closest friends.....thank you all for coming!! Check out some of the pictures.......Meats

Wedding and Fuel Problems!!!

2008-06-18T16:21:00.002-04:00

To All.....The time has finally come. My oldest child is getting married! In three days I will not have lost a son, but rather gained a daughter-in-law!! We are so excited for all of the up-coming festivities! We'll be with all of our families and best friends.....a good time will be had by all!!

OK, now down to business......what are we going to do about the price of gas? Should we not use as much (cut the demand) or drill for new supplies in the Gulf of Mexico (before the Cubans and China drain it all). What really is the problem? If the demand goes down but the cost remains high, then I'd say we need an alternative fuel source...quick. If we tap new oil fields in the Gulf, do we have enough refineries to produce the fuel and will that reduce our cost at the pump? The way I see it, people will keep paying $4.00 a gallon, maybe cut back on driving a little. BUT, if the world ran out of oil next week, you can bet your A$$ we would have an alternative fuel in no time flat! Either nuclear, hydrogen or magnetic.......but somehow I feel there is somebody out there smart enough to create the solution for the world!! If you're out there, let me know!! This world needs you!!!! Meats